THURSDAY 18TH JUNE
After another lesson with Rowena on the big slopes, where I fall over a lot and my feet hurt because of the fact I have to apply more pressure due to the incline. I went about my day with a lot of apprehension. It’s amazing how quickly you can lose your confidence after a few falls, and it seems like I’m starting over again.
That’s the boring bit of the day over. The real story of the day happened on the way home.We got on the bus at 15:00p.m ready for the fifty minute journey back to Methven. We were having a laugh and a joke with a couple of Aussies who we’d been talking to on the way up, just asking how their day had been and what not.
About ten minutes had passed and then there was a cry of ‘Stop the bus. There’s someone down there.’ With that the driver pulled over and about ten of us shot off the bus to see what was happening. Within seconds the reality of what had happened hit us. A car had gone over the edge of the cliff and rolled down about 200 yards. There was a woman about eighty feet down the cliff who had tried to climb back up, and her husband was still sat outside the wreck of the car unable to move anywhere.
One of the Aussies raced down to the devastation below to help out the man. In the meantime two other guys went to the aid of the woman and helped her back to the road, where she broke down unable to control her emotions.
As luck would have it in the five minutes that had passed three more cars had reached us and one of them had a doctor and a nurse aboard. The best of it was they had both been involved in a training exercise just six days previous relating to this kind of situation. With 111 having been called and the mountain rescue on their way, plus a doctor taking charge of the situation there was very little else we could do so we headed back to town, still astonished at what we had just witnessed.
FRIDAY 19TH JUNE
We didn’t go up the mountain today, as we were both quite tired from yesterday’s exertions. We didn’t really want to move either at 06:00a.m as it was absolutely freezing, so most of the day was spent doing a few chores. Also, it gave us a chance to sort out the TV. After spending most of the day up a mountain you don’t really want to be doing too much at night, so because we don’t gave have all that much money, watching TV is about all there is to do that’s free. Unfortunately the reception in town is not the best, so we asked Mark (the campsite owner) if he had a better aerial than the one we owned. Around twenty minutes later he returned with an aerial off the side of a house, and told us to hang it in a tree and make sure that it was pointing towards the kitchen. It does look like a bit of a bodge job, but it works so we can’t really complain.
The two people who were involved in the accident yesterday are both recovering after being air lifted to Christchurch hospital. The woman suffered only minor cuts and shock, while the man had a fractured pelvis and large laceration to the head. The car, a Toyota 4x4, was a right-off. If they had been in anything smaller they would both have probably died.
SATURDAY 20TH JUNE
Today was a very bad day for me as far as my snowboarding was concerned. I went straight on to the big run and within ten minutes I suffered a pretty bad fall. It was so bad that I couldn’t even walk for the entire day and it has rendered me unable to board until about Wednesday. Not the best news by any stretch. In the evening we went out to watch the All Blacks against France. We didn’t stay out much longer than full time as I was in a fair bit of pain just being stood up.
SUNDAY 21st JUNE
Sundays are definitely going to be our day off from the slopes, just because of the sheer volume of people. There are far too many and it makes it difficult to ski or ride comfortably. Instead we just dossed around the campsite watching TV and getting warm in front of the log fire. I also heard that yesterday one of the lift operators was having some ski time and a snowboarder ran into him and caused him (the lifty) to break his neck in two places. In my opinion there are too many people who don’t know the basics i.e. stopping and turning. If they did then things like this wouldn’t happen as everyone concerned knows how to avoid the situation. Maybe it was just a freak accident but I’m not so sure.
Monday, June 22, 2009
Rolling, Rolling, Rolling (18-21/06/09)
THURSDAY 18TH JUNE
After another lesson with Rowena on the big slopes, where I fall over a lot and my feet hurt because of the fact I have to apply more pressure due to the incline. I went about my day with a lot of apprehension. It’s amazing how quickly you can lose your confidence after a few falls, and it seems like I’m starting over again.
That’s the boring bit of the day over. The real story of the day happened on the way home.We got on the bus at 15:00p.m ready for the fifty minute journey back to Methven. We were having a laugh and a joke with a couple of Aussies who we’d been talking to on the way up, just asking how their day had been and what not.
About ten minutes had passed and then there was a cry of ‘Stop the bus. There’s someone down there.’ With that the driver pulled over and about ten of us shot off the bus to see what was happening. Within seconds the reality of what had happened hit us. A car had gone over the edge of the cliff and rolled down about 200 yards. There was a woman about eighty feet down the cliff who had tried to climb back up, and her husband was still sat outside the wreck of the car unable to move anywhere.
One of the Aussies raced down to the devastation below to help out the man. In the meantime two other guys went to the aid of the woman and helped her back to the road, where she broke down unable to control her emotions.
As luck would have it in the five minutes that had passed three more cars had reached us and one of them had a doctor and a nurse aboard. The best of it was they had both been involved in a training exercise just six days previous relating to this kind of situation. With 111 having been called and the mountain rescue on their way, plus a doctor taking charge of the situation there was very little else we could do so we headed back to town, still astonished at what we had just witnessed.
FRIDAY 19TH JUNE
We didn’t go up the mountain today, as we were both quite tired from yesterday’s exertions. We didn’t really want to move either at 06:00a.m as it was absolutely freezing, so most of the day was spent doing a few chores. Also, it gave us a chance to sort out the TV. After spending most of the day up a mountain you don’t really want to be doing too much at night, so because we don’t gave have all that much money, watching TV is about all there is to do that’s free. Unfortunately the reception in town is not the best, so we asked Mark (the campsite owner) if he had a better aerial than the one we owned. Around twenty minutes later he returned with an aerial off the side of a house, and told us to hang it in a tree and make sure that it was pointing towards the kitchen. It does look like a bit of a bodge job, but it works so we can’t really complain.
The two people who were involved in the accident yesterday are both recovering after being air lifted to Christchurch hospital. The woman suffered only minor cuts and shock, while the man had a fractured pelvis and large laceration to the head. The car, a Toyota 4x4, was a right-off. If they had been in anything smaller they would both have probably died.
SATURDAY 20TH JUNE
Today was a very bad day for me as far as my snowboarding was concerned. I went straight on to the big run and within ten minutes I suffered a pretty bad fall. It was so bad that I couldn’t even walk for the entire day and it has rendered me unable to board until about Wednesday. Not the best news by any stretch. In the evening we went out to watch the All Blacks against France. We didn’t stay out much longer than full time as I was in a fair bit of pain just being stood up.
SUNDAY 21st JUNE
Sundays are definitely going to be our day off from the slopes, just because of the sheer volume of people. There are far too many and it makes it difficult to ski or ride comfortably. Instead we just dossed around the campsite watching TV and getting warm in front of the log fire. I also heard that yesterday one of the lift operators was having some ski time and a snowboarder ran into him and caused him (the lifty) to break his neck in two places. In my opinion there are too many people who don’t know the basics i.e. stopping and turning. If they did then things like this wouldn’t happen as everyone concerned knows how to avoid the situation. Maybe it was just a freak accident but I’m not so sure.
After another lesson with Rowena on the big slopes, where I fall over a lot and my feet hurt because of the fact I have to apply more pressure due to the incline. I went about my day with a lot of apprehension. It’s amazing how quickly you can lose your confidence after a few falls, and it seems like I’m starting over again.
That’s the boring bit of the day over. The real story of the day happened on the way home.We got on the bus at 15:00p.m ready for the fifty minute journey back to Methven. We were having a laugh and a joke with a couple of Aussies who we’d been talking to on the way up, just asking how their day had been and what not.
About ten minutes had passed and then there was a cry of ‘Stop the bus. There’s someone down there.’ With that the driver pulled over and about ten of us shot off the bus to see what was happening. Within seconds the reality of what had happened hit us. A car had gone over the edge of the cliff and rolled down about 200 yards. There was a woman about eighty feet down the cliff who had tried to climb back up, and her husband was still sat outside the wreck of the car unable to move anywhere.
One of the Aussies raced down to the devastation below to help out the man. In the meantime two other guys went to the aid of the woman and helped her back to the road, where she broke down unable to control her emotions.
As luck would have it in the five minutes that had passed three more cars had reached us and one of them had a doctor and a nurse aboard. The best of it was they had both been involved in a training exercise just six days previous relating to this kind of situation. With 111 having been called and the mountain rescue on their way, plus a doctor taking charge of the situation there was very little else we could do so we headed back to town, still astonished at what we had just witnessed.
FRIDAY 19TH JUNE
We didn’t go up the mountain today, as we were both quite tired from yesterday’s exertions. We didn’t really want to move either at 06:00a.m as it was absolutely freezing, so most of the day was spent doing a few chores. Also, it gave us a chance to sort out the TV. After spending most of the day up a mountain you don’t really want to be doing too much at night, so because we don’t gave have all that much money, watching TV is about all there is to do that’s free. Unfortunately the reception in town is not the best, so we asked Mark (the campsite owner) if he had a better aerial than the one we owned. Around twenty minutes later he returned with an aerial off the side of a house, and told us to hang it in a tree and make sure that it was pointing towards the kitchen. It does look like a bit of a bodge job, but it works so we can’t really complain.
The two people who were involved in the accident yesterday are both recovering after being air lifted to Christchurch hospital. The woman suffered only minor cuts and shock, while the man had a fractured pelvis and large laceration to the head. The car, a Toyota 4x4, was a right-off. If they had been in anything smaller they would both have probably died.
SATURDAY 20TH JUNE
Today was a very bad day for me as far as my snowboarding was concerned. I went straight on to the big run and within ten minutes I suffered a pretty bad fall. It was so bad that I couldn’t even walk for the entire day and it has rendered me unable to board until about Wednesday. Not the best news by any stretch. In the evening we went out to watch the All Blacks against France. We didn’t stay out much longer than full time as I was in a fair bit of pain just being stood up.
SUNDAY 21st JUNE
Sundays are definitely going to be our day off from the slopes, just because of the sheer volume of people. There are far too many and it makes it difficult to ski or ride comfortably. Instead we just dossed around the campsite watching TV and getting warm in front of the log fire. I also heard that yesterday one of the lift operators was having some ski time and a snowboarder ran into him and caused him (the lifty) to break his neck in two places. In my opinion there are too many people who don’t know the basics i.e. stopping and turning. If they did then things like this wouldn’t happen as everyone concerned knows how to avoid the situation. Maybe it was just a freak accident but I’m not so sure.
Merthyr Tydfill Is Shit: Fact? (15-17/06/09)
MONDAY 15TH JUNE
It’s the first day back on the slopes today and I’m hoping to improve somewhat on my previous attempts. Louise and I both decide that we’ll go it alone today and see if we can make any improvements without the help of an instructor. For the first hour or so I’m going well, making my turns well and staying upright the entire length of the slope. However, my overconfidence becomes my downfall and the majority of the second half of the day is spent on my arse, or crashing on my knees. Not exactly what I’d been hoping for at this morning. After carrying on where I left off this morning, I’m ready to pack in for the day come 14:30p.m. I’ve not really improved at all and I’m feeling a little sorry for myself; and Christ my legs are killing.
TUESDAY 16TH JUNE
The alarm went off at the ungodly hour of 06:00a.m and boy was it cold. So cold in fact that both Louise and I rolled straight over and went to sleep again until 09:00a.m, and therefore making it highly unlikely that we’d make the late bus either. Eventually we got it together enough to go and shower and somehow try and waste a whole day in Methven. The good news was we found something to do all day; the bad news was it wasn’t all that interesting, and could have been done in a lot less time had we not lost each other. I don’t know how it happened but Louise wandered off after going to the post office and because I don’t really pay attention I meandered off in the opposite direction. It took us almost an hour to find one another, which is no mean feat with only two streets to hide amongst.Back at the campsite we spent the night in the company of a young and well educated couple from Wales named Mike and Hayley. Some of the people you meet while you’re away are so dull that you won’t want to recall (or can’t) anything they ever say or do because they’re just not that interesting. Gladly these two weren’t of that ilk and we had a rather pleasant night recalling our travels and telling stories of back home. The best one that they told us was that according to the Lonely Planet guidebooks their hometown of Merthyr Tydfil is so bad that it just says ‘avoid.’ I’ve never been to Merthyr but I want to go there now just because the Lonely Planet is nearly always wrong in its’ opinion of small towns and its’ praise for big cities is nearly always over-exaggerated.
WEDNESDAY 17TH JUNE
It’s back to the mountain today after our lazy day yesterday. Louise and I both opt for another private lesson and both of us get new teachers. Fortunately this is a good thing as I learn a hell of a lot more in one hour with my new teacher Rowena (I like this name. I don’t know why I just do) than I had with my first. She manages to get me turning properly on both heels and toes, which is quite an achievement as previously I hadn’t been that confident due to me constantly falling over. The rest of the day I’m zooming down the slopes full of it. Maybe tomorrow I’ll get off the beginner slopes and be a little more daring.
It’s the first day back on the slopes today and I’m hoping to improve somewhat on my previous attempts. Louise and I both decide that we’ll go it alone today and see if we can make any improvements without the help of an instructor. For the first hour or so I’m going well, making my turns well and staying upright the entire length of the slope. However, my overconfidence becomes my downfall and the majority of the second half of the day is spent on my arse, or crashing on my knees. Not exactly what I’d been hoping for at this morning. After carrying on where I left off this morning, I’m ready to pack in for the day come 14:30p.m. I’ve not really improved at all and I’m feeling a little sorry for myself; and Christ my legs are killing.
TUESDAY 16TH JUNE
The alarm went off at the ungodly hour of 06:00a.m and boy was it cold. So cold in fact that both Louise and I rolled straight over and went to sleep again until 09:00a.m, and therefore making it highly unlikely that we’d make the late bus either. Eventually we got it together enough to go and shower and somehow try and waste a whole day in Methven. The good news was we found something to do all day; the bad news was it wasn’t all that interesting, and could have been done in a lot less time had we not lost each other. I don’t know how it happened but Louise wandered off after going to the post office and because I don’t really pay attention I meandered off in the opposite direction. It took us almost an hour to find one another, which is no mean feat with only two streets to hide amongst.Back at the campsite we spent the night in the company of a young and well educated couple from Wales named Mike and Hayley. Some of the people you meet while you’re away are so dull that you won’t want to recall (or can’t) anything they ever say or do because they’re just not that interesting. Gladly these two weren’t of that ilk and we had a rather pleasant night recalling our travels and telling stories of back home. The best one that they told us was that according to the Lonely Planet guidebooks their hometown of Merthyr Tydfil is so bad that it just says ‘avoid.’ I’ve never been to Merthyr but I want to go there now just because the Lonely Planet is nearly always wrong in its’ opinion of small towns and its’ praise for big cities is nearly always over-exaggerated.
WEDNESDAY 17TH JUNE
It’s back to the mountain today after our lazy day yesterday. Louise and I both opt for another private lesson and both of us get new teachers. Fortunately this is a good thing as I learn a hell of a lot more in one hour with my new teacher Rowena (I like this name. I don’t know why I just do) than I had with my first. She manages to get me turning properly on both heels and toes, which is quite an achievement as previously I hadn’t been that confident due to me constantly falling over. The rest of the day I’m zooming down the slopes full of it. Maybe tomorrow I’ll get off the beginner slopes and be a little more daring.
Merthyr Tydfill Is Shit: Fact? (15-17/06/09)
MONDAY 15TH JUNE
It’s the first day back on the slopes today and I’m hoping to improve somewhat on my previous attempts. Louise and I both decide that we’ll go it alone today and see if we can make any improvements without the help of an instructor. For the first hour or so I’m going well, making my turns well and staying upright the entire length of the slope. However, my overconfidence becomes my downfall and the majority of the second half of the day is spent on my arse, or crashing on my knees. Not exactly what I’d been hoping for at this morning. After carrying on where I left off this morning, I’m ready to pack in for the day come 14:30p.m. I’ve not really improved at all and I’m feeling a little sorry for myself; and Christ my legs are killing.
TUESDAY 16TH JUNE
The alarm went off at the ungodly hour of 06:00a.m and boy was it cold. So cold in fact that both Louise and I rolled straight over and went to sleep again until 09:00a.m, and therefore making it highly unlikely that we’d make the late bus either. Eventually we got it together enough to go and shower and somehow try and waste a whole day in Methven. The good news was we found something to do all day; the bad news was it wasn’t all that interesting, and could have been done in a lot less time had we not lost each other. I don’t know how it happened but Louise wandered off after going to the post office and because I don’t really pay attention I meandered off in the opposite direction. It took us almost an hour to find one another, which is no mean feat with only two streets to hide amongst.Back at the campsite we spent the night in the company of a young and well educated couple from Wales named Mike and Hayley. Some of the people you meet while you’re away are so dull that you won’t want to recall (or can’t) anything they ever say or do because they’re just not that interesting. Gladly these two weren’t of that ilk and we had a rather pleasant night recalling our travels and telling stories of back home. The best one that they told us was that according to the Lonely Planet guidebooks their hometown of Merthyr Tydfil is so bad that it just says ‘avoid.’ I’ve never been to Merthyr but I want to go there now just because the Lonely Planet is nearly always wrong in its’ opinion of small towns and its’ praise for big cities is nearly always over-exaggerated.
WEDNESDAY 17TH JUNE
It’s back to the mountain today after our lazy day yesterday. Louise and I both opt for another private lesson and both of us get new teachers. Fortunately this is a good thing as I learn a hell of a lot more in one hour with my new teacher Rowena (I like this name. I don’t know why I just do) than I had with my first. She manages to get me turning properly on both heels and toes, which is quite an achievement as previously I hadn’t been that confident due to me constantly falling over. The rest of the day I’m zooming down the slopes full of it. Maybe tomorrow I’ll get off the beginner slopes and be a little more daring.
It’s the first day back on the slopes today and I’m hoping to improve somewhat on my previous attempts. Louise and I both decide that we’ll go it alone today and see if we can make any improvements without the help of an instructor. For the first hour or so I’m going well, making my turns well and staying upright the entire length of the slope. However, my overconfidence becomes my downfall and the majority of the second half of the day is spent on my arse, or crashing on my knees. Not exactly what I’d been hoping for at this morning. After carrying on where I left off this morning, I’m ready to pack in for the day come 14:30p.m. I’ve not really improved at all and I’m feeling a little sorry for myself; and Christ my legs are killing.
TUESDAY 16TH JUNE
The alarm went off at the ungodly hour of 06:00a.m and boy was it cold. So cold in fact that both Louise and I rolled straight over and went to sleep again until 09:00a.m, and therefore making it highly unlikely that we’d make the late bus either. Eventually we got it together enough to go and shower and somehow try and waste a whole day in Methven. The good news was we found something to do all day; the bad news was it wasn’t all that interesting, and could have been done in a lot less time had we not lost each other. I don’t know how it happened but Louise wandered off after going to the post office and because I don’t really pay attention I meandered off in the opposite direction. It took us almost an hour to find one another, which is no mean feat with only two streets to hide amongst.Back at the campsite we spent the night in the company of a young and well educated couple from Wales named Mike and Hayley. Some of the people you meet while you’re away are so dull that you won’t want to recall (or can’t) anything they ever say or do because they’re just not that interesting. Gladly these two weren’t of that ilk and we had a rather pleasant night recalling our travels and telling stories of back home. The best one that they told us was that according to the Lonely Planet guidebooks their hometown of Merthyr Tydfil is so bad that it just says ‘avoid.’ I’ve never been to Merthyr but I want to go there now just because the Lonely Planet is nearly always wrong in its’ opinion of small towns and its’ praise for big cities is nearly always over-exaggerated.
WEDNESDAY 17TH JUNE
It’s back to the mountain today after our lazy day yesterday. Louise and I both opt for another private lesson and both of us get new teachers. Fortunately this is a good thing as I learn a hell of a lot more in one hour with my new teacher Rowena (I like this name. I don’t know why I just do) than I had with my first. She manages to get me turning properly on both heels and toes, which is quite an achievement as previously I hadn’t been that confident due to me constantly falling over. The rest of the day I’m zooming down the slopes full of it. Maybe tomorrow I’ll get off the beginner slopes and be a little more daring.
Do The Haka! (11-14/06/09)
THURSDAY 11TH JUNE
We got up at stupid o’clock as Dot and Flash were leaving and had to be at the airport for 07:45a.m. I don’t know why but Louise seems to think that because you’re told you can check in at the airport three hours before take-off, you have to be there three hours before take-off. So we head to Christchurch international airport at 07:15a.m.After Kath and Andrew are checked-in, Louise and I are ready to leave. As its goodbye for about three or four months, there are a few tears on Dot and Louise’s part. After taking the big van back, it was back to reality and the small camper once more. Christ, there’s hardly any room in these things. At least we’re going to be on a campsite for eight weeks so we’ve got somewhere to relax where there’s a real lounge, and a proper kitchen to cook in. But first it’s off to Dunedin again.
FRIDAY 12TH JUNE
We stayed on the campsite for the most part of the day as we’re having a big day tomorrow. It’s the first test between New Zealand and France and we’re going so it will probably be a very long and costly day.
SATURDAY 13TH JUNE
Today is match day so we get ourselves wrapped up as it is very cold, and head towards ‘The Octagon’: the heart of Dunedin city centre. We didn’t get to town until around 13:30p.m but the octagon was buzzing with both Kiwis and French. Now most of the day was spent drinking what the locals call simply ‘kiwi. ’ it is in fact premium strength lager called Steinlager; a rather palatable alcoholic beverage that is only NZ$6 a pint. While supping lager and watching the locals get agitated by the French singing ‘Allez Le Bleus,’ I got more and drunk; so much so that I can’t really remember much about the match itself. I can remember the All Blacks doing the Haka, and I can remember somebody letting a cockerel loose on the pitch. Also I managed to get into the executive lounge and steal a programme that had been left for some important rugby dignitary. Everything else is a blur. Although I did see a man on stilts dressed as a devil/ram
SUNDAY 14TH JUNE
With the most rotten hangover ever we headed to Methven (via Ashburton, where I sat in the van minging, while Louise went food shopping) to start our six-eight weeks of intense skiing/snowboarding. Hopefully after a few lessons I’ll get the hang of it. However, not being a natural athlete or having a very good sense of balance, standing with two feet strapped to a five foot piece of wood and propelling myself down a hill doesn’t sound like something I will take to with ease. Let’s see.
We got up at stupid o’clock as Dot and Flash were leaving and had to be at the airport for 07:45a.m. I don’t know why but Louise seems to think that because you’re told you can check in at the airport three hours before take-off, you have to be there three hours before take-off. So we head to Christchurch international airport at 07:15a.m.After Kath and Andrew are checked-in, Louise and I are ready to leave. As its goodbye for about three or four months, there are a few tears on Dot and Louise’s part. After taking the big van back, it was back to reality and the small camper once more. Christ, there’s hardly any room in these things. At least we’re going to be on a campsite for eight weeks so we’ve got somewhere to relax where there’s a real lounge, and a proper kitchen to cook in. But first it’s off to Dunedin again.
FRIDAY 12TH JUNE
We stayed on the campsite for the most part of the day as we’re having a big day tomorrow. It’s the first test between New Zealand and France and we’re going so it will probably be a very long and costly day.
SATURDAY 13TH JUNE
Today is match day so we get ourselves wrapped up as it is very cold, and head towards ‘The Octagon’: the heart of Dunedin city centre. We didn’t get to town until around 13:30p.m but the octagon was buzzing with both Kiwis and French. Now most of the day was spent drinking what the locals call simply ‘kiwi. ’ it is in fact premium strength lager called Steinlager; a rather palatable alcoholic beverage that is only NZ$6 a pint. While supping lager and watching the locals get agitated by the French singing ‘Allez Le Bleus,’ I got more and drunk; so much so that I can’t really remember much about the match itself. I can remember the All Blacks doing the Haka, and I can remember somebody letting a cockerel loose on the pitch. Also I managed to get into the executive lounge and steal a programme that had been left for some important rugby dignitary. Everything else is a blur. Although I did see a man on stilts dressed as a devil/ram
SUNDAY 14TH JUNE
With the most rotten hangover ever we headed to Methven (via Ashburton, where I sat in the van minging, while Louise went food shopping) to start our six-eight weeks of intense skiing/snowboarding. Hopefully after a few lessons I’ll get the hang of it. However, not being a natural athlete or having a very good sense of balance, standing with two feet strapped to a five foot piece of wood and propelling myself down a hill doesn’t sound like something I will take to with ease. Let’s see.
Do The Haka! (11-14/06/09)
THURSDAY 11TH JUNE
We got up at stupid o’clock as Dot and Flash were leaving and had to be at the airport for 07:45a.m. I don’t know why but Louise seems to think that because you’re told you can check in at the airport three hours before take-off, you have to be there three hours before take-off. So we head to Christchurch international airport at 07:15a.m.After Kath and Andrew are checked-in, Louise and I are ready to leave. As its goodbye for about three or four months, there are a few tears on Dot and Louise’s part. After taking the big van back, it was back to reality and the small camper once more. Christ, there’s hardly any room in these things. At least we’re going to be on a campsite for eight weeks so we’ve got somewhere to relax where there’s a real lounge, and a proper kitchen to cook in. But first it’s off to Dunedin again.
FRIDAY 12TH JUNE
We stayed on the campsite for the most part of the day as we’re having a big day tomorrow. It’s the first test between New Zealand and France and we’re going so it will probably be a very long and costly day.
SATURDAY 13TH JUNE
Today is match day so we get ourselves wrapped up as it is very cold, and head towards ‘The Octagon’: the heart of Dunedin city centre. We didn’t get to town until around 13:30p.m but the octagon was buzzing with both Kiwis and French. Now most of the day was spent drinking what the locals call simply ‘kiwi. ’ it is in fact premium strength lager called Steinlager; a rather palatable alcoholic beverage that is only NZ$6 a pint. While supping lager and watching the locals get agitated by the French singing ‘Allez Le Bleus,’ I got more and drunk; so much so that I can’t really remember much about the match itself. I can remember the All Blacks doing the Haka, and I can remember somebody letting a cockerel loose on the pitch. Also I managed to get into the executive lounge and steal a programme that had been left for some important rugby dignitary. Everything else is a blur. Although I did see a man on stilts dressed as a devil/ram
SUNDAY 14TH JUNE
With the most rotten hangover ever we headed to Methven (via Ashburton, where I sat in the van minging, while Louise went food shopping) to start our six-eight weeks of intense skiing/snowboarding. Hopefully after a few lessons I’ll get the hang of it. However, not being a natural athlete or having a very good sense of balance, standing with two feet strapped to a five foot piece of wood and propelling myself down a hill doesn’t sound like something I will take to with ease. Let’s see.
We got up at stupid o’clock as Dot and Flash were leaving and had to be at the airport for 07:45a.m. I don’t know why but Louise seems to think that because you’re told you can check in at the airport three hours before take-off, you have to be there three hours before take-off. So we head to Christchurch international airport at 07:15a.m.After Kath and Andrew are checked-in, Louise and I are ready to leave. As its goodbye for about three or four months, there are a few tears on Dot and Louise’s part. After taking the big van back, it was back to reality and the small camper once more. Christ, there’s hardly any room in these things. At least we’re going to be on a campsite for eight weeks so we’ve got somewhere to relax where there’s a real lounge, and a proper kitchen to cook in. But first it’s off to Dunedin again.
FRIDAY 12TH JUNE
We stayed on the campsite for the most part of the day as we’re having a big day tomorrow. It’s the first test between New Zealand and France and we’re going so it will probably be a very long and costly day.
SATURDAY 13TH JUNE
Today is match day so we get ourselves wrapped up as it is very cold, and head towards ‘The Octagon’: the heart of Dunedin city centre. We didn’t get to town until around 13:30p.m but the octagon was buzzing with both Kiwis and French. Now most of the day was spent drinking what the locals call simply ‘kiwi. ’ it is in fact premium strength lager called Steinlager; a rather palatable alcoholic beverage that is only NZ$6 a pint. While supping lager and watching the locals get agitated by the French singing ‘Allez Le Bleus,’ I got more and drunk; so much so that I can’t really remember much about the match itself. I can remember the All Blacks doing the Haka, and I can remember somebody letting a cockerel loose on the pitch. Also I managed to get into the executive lounge and steal a programme that had been left for some important rugby dignitary. Everything else is a blur. Although I did see a man on stilts dressed as a devil/ram
SUNDAY 14TH JUNE
With the most rotten hangover ever we headed to Methven (via Ashburton, where I sat in the van minging, while Louise went food shopping) to start our six-eight weeks of intense skiing/snowboarding. Hopefully after a few lessons I’ll get the hang of it. However, not being a natural athlete or having a very good sense of balance, standing with two feet strapped to a five foot piece of wood and propelling myself down a hill doesn’t sound like something I will take to with ease. Let’s see.
So Long, Fairwell, Auf Wiedersehen, Adieu (8-10/06/09)
MONDAY 8TH JUNE
Today, after finally sorting out everything, we leave Methven and head again to Kaikoura via Christchurch.In Christchurch we find out that our gas bottle is out of date and so therefore it can’t be filled legally. This means we have to go back to the hire place for yet another problem with the van. This puts us a couple of hours behind and makes Louise pretty pissed off that she has to drive in the dark yet again. When we arrive at Kaikoura the likelihood of the whale watch going ahead is very small, as the weather is pretty filthy, but we’ll see tomorrow.
TUESDAY 9TH JUNE
Dot Com and Flash tried to go whale watching on a boat today, but were unable to due to rough seas. They did however go and do it in a plane for a whole NZ$5 more. I went looking for some books at the very quaint little book shop on the high street and picked up a couple of Bill Bryson novels. They’re bound to be good as he’s one of the funniest authors I’ve ever read. It was back on the road as soon as Derek and Clive had finished their whale watch (where they saw four compared to our one) we headed back to Christchurch along the rather awkward Highway One (what classes for motorways in New Zealand takes some getting used to).
WEDNESDAY 10TH JUNE
It’s Dot and Flash’s last full day in the country, so the only obvious thing to do is go souvenir shopping for one last time. I don’t like shopping unless it’s for my benefit. So I spent most of the afternoon stood in Cathedral Square, Christchurch, watching grown men playing giant chess. By giant chess, I don’t mean chess with giants, but chess using rather large chess pieces. Watching other people play chess is tantamount to looking at other people’s holiday photos: it’s incredibly boring.As a gift from Flash for driving him and Dot around New Zealand for five weeks, he took us out for dinner. With the cost of eating out fairly high everywhere you go, we opted for the buffet at the casino. The food was good and I won NZ$400 on the roulette; every little helps when you’re not earning.
Today, after finally sorting out everything, we leave Methven and head again to Kaikoura via Christchurch.In Christchurch we find out that our gas bottle is out of date and so therefore it can’t be filled legally. This means we have to go back to the hire place for yet another problem with the van. This puts us a couple of hours behind and makes Louise pretty pissed off that she has to drive in the dark yet again. When we arrive at Kaikoura the likelihood of the whale watch going ahead is very small, as the weather is pretty filthy, but we’ll see tomorrow.
TUESDAY 9TH JUNE
Dot Com and Flash tried to go whale watching on a boat today, but were unable to due to rough seas. They did however go and do it in a plane for a whole NZ$5 more. I went looking for some books at the very quaint little book shop on the high street and picked up a couple of Bill Bryson novels. They’re bound to be good as he’s one of the funniest authors I’ve ever read. It was back on the road as soon as Derek and Clive had finished their whale watch (where they saw four compared to our one) we headed back to Christchurch along the rather awkward Highway One (what classes for motorways in New Zealand takes some getting used to).
WEDNESDAY 10TH JUNE
It’s Dot and Flash’s last full day in the country, so the only obvious thing to do is go souvenir shopping for one last time. I don’t like shopping unless it’s for my benefit. So I spent most of the afternoon stood in Cathedral Square, Christchurch, watching grown men playing giant chess. By giant chess, I don’t mean chess with giants, but chess using rather large chess pieces. Watching other people play chess is tantamount to looking at other people’s holiday photos: it’s incredibly boring.As a gift from Flash for driving him and Dot around New Zealand for five weeks, he took us out for dinner. With the cost of eating out fairly high everywhere you go, we opted for the buffet at the casino. The food was good and I won NZ$400 on the roulette; every little helps when you’re not earning.
So Long, Fairwell, Auf Wiedersehen, Adieu (8-10/06/09)
MONDAY 8TH JUNE
Today, after finally sorting out everything, we leave Methven and head again to Kaikoura via Christchurch.In Christchurch we find out that our gas bottle is out of date and so therefore it can’t be filled legally. This means we have to go back to the hire place for yet another problem with the van. This puts us a couple of hours behind and makes Louise pretty pissed off that she has to drive in the dark yet again. When we arrive at Kaikoura the likelihood of the whale watch going ahead is very small, as the weather is pretty filthy, but we’ll see tomorrow.
TUESDAY 9TH JUNE
Dot Com and Flash tried to go whale watching on a boat today, but were unable to due to rough seas. They did however go and do it in a plane for a whole NZ$5 more. I went looking for some books at the very quaint little book shop on the high street and picked up a couple of Bill Bryson novels. They’re bound to be good as he’s one of the funniest authors I’ve ever read. It was back on the road as soon as Derek and Clive had finished their whale watch (where they saw four compared to our one) we headed back to Christchurch along the rather awkward Highway One (what classes for motorways in New Zealand takes some getting used to).
WEDNESDAY 10TH JUNE
It’s Dot and Flash’s last full day in the country, so the only obvious thing to do is go souvenir shopping for one last time. I don’t like shopping unless it’s for my benefit. So I spent most of the afternoon stood in Cathedral Square, Christchurch, watching grown men playing giant chess. By giant chess, I don’t mean chess with giants, but chess using rather large chess pieces. Watching other people play chess is tantamount to looking at other people’s holiday photos: it’s incredibly boring.As a gift from Flash for driving him and Dot around New Zealand for five weeks, he took us out for dinner. With the cost of eating out fairly high everywhere you go, we opted for the buffet at the casino. The food was good and I won NZ$400 on the roulette; every little helps when you’re not earning.
Today, after finally sorting out everything, we leave Methven and head again to Kaikoura via Christchurch.In Christchurch we find out that our gas bottle is out of date and so therefore it can’t be filled legally. This means we have to go back to the hire place for yet another problem with the van. This puts us a couple of hours behind and makes Louise pretty pissed off that she has to drive in the dark yet again. When we arrive at Kaikoura the likelihood of the whale watch going ahead is very small, as the weather is pretty filthy, but we’ll see tomorrow.
TUESDAY 9TH JUNE
Dot Com and Flash tried to go whale watching on a boat today, but were unable to due to rough seas. They did however go and do it in a plane for a whole NZ$5 more. I went looking for some books at the very quaint little book shop on the high street and picked up a couple of Bill Bryson novels. They’re bound to be good as he’s one of the funniest authors I’ve ever read. It was back on the road as soon as Derek and Clive had finished their whale watch (where they saw four compared to our one) we headed back to Christchurch along the rather awkward Highway One (what classes for motorways in New Zealand takes some getting used to).
WEDNESDAY 10TH JUNE
It’s Dot and Flash’s last full day in the country, so the only obvious thing to do is go souvenir shopping for one last time. I don’t like shopping unless it’s for my benefit. So I spent most of the afternoon stood in Cathedral Square, Christchurch, watching grown men playing giant chess. By giant chess, I don’t mean chess with giants, but chess using rather large chess pieces. Watching other people play chess is tantamount to looking at other people’s holiday photos: it’s incredibly boring.As a gift from Flash for driving him and Dot around New Zealand for five weeks, he took us out for dinner. With the cost of eating out fairly high everywhere you go, we opted for the buffet at the casino. The food was good and I won NZ$400 on the roulette; every little helps when you’re not earning.
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
Snowboard Master (4-7/06/09)
THURSDAY 4TH JUNE
We’re off to Methven today. Methven is the place where Louise and I are going to be based for about six to eight weeks as we’re going to learn how to snowboard and ski. Due to the fact that Mt. Hutt has had some good early snow Flash said he fancied having a go as he’s a pretty good skier, so we thought we might as well go for a couple of days while we’re passing through. On the way we go over Arthurs Pass again, but this time we don’t see any Kea’s that we shouldn’t feed and I have a slight feeling of regret that my eagerness to feed them may have caused one or two to become slovenly and die.
FRIDAY 5TH JUNE
A very slow day today as we’d missed all two of the busses up to Mt. Hutt and so we had to bum around the town. I did have my first haircut since early March which was done by a girl from Bristol, who just so happens to have gone to school with one of the two people I’d ever spoken to in Methven before today- Small world. In the evening we had a homemade roast dinner and then I built a fire.
SATURDAY 6TH JUNE
We’re all up at 07:00a.m to catch the 09:45a.m bus up the hill to the ski slopes. It’s NZ$26 each to get up in the bus. Hopefully if we’re here for a good part of the season we can get a better price on the bus otherwise we’ll be cutting our snow time dramatically.
On the way up to the mountain Dot near enough has a heart attack as it’s so high up and the roads are windy and it’s windy and there are zero crash barriers. It comes as little consolation to her that the driver has done this for more than twenty years and a bus has so far failed to fall off the edge since the road has been open. Once we’re in and kitted up Flash goes about his day alone somewhere amongst the thousands of advanced level skiers while Louise and I find someone to teach us. In no time we find ourselves in some group lessons and we head our separate ways. I’m being taught by Matt a 26 year old from Christchurch who has been teaching for about three years even though he’s only been snowboarding for a total of five. Maybe it’s true what they say about snowboarding: it doesn’t take you long to get good at it.
The first challenge for me is to get into the leading foot of one of my bindings. Because I wasn’t too sure about which foot I would be leading with, Lyn the Shopkeeper set me up duck i.e. with both feet, toes angled out. It doesn’t take me long to realise that I’ll be more comfortable leading left-footed, which comes as a little bit of a surprise. Before long I’m able to snowboard in a straight line, turn left and right and stop. The only thing is I tend to fall over at will at regular intervals.
After lunch (which is needed) the rest of my group disappear and so I get one-on-one tuition. This helps me to sort out some of my problems and soon I’m off down the slopes on my own, but I’m still falling on my arse. And then the snow comes. This also coincides with the end of my lesson, which means I’m trying to ‘board on my own in heavy snow after only minimal guidance from Matt. I stick with it and manage not to kill myself or break any bones, which I must admit is good going on my part.
On the way down it’s still pissing with snow, and because she can’t see the drop, Dot is fine with the bus journey back into Methven - Weirdo.
SUNDAY 7TH JUNE
An even earlier start today as we get on the 07:45a.m bus. Dot stays at the campsite as she’s going for a hot-air balloon ride, which leaves the rest of us in peace. Somehow the journey takes two hours and so we miss out on an early lesson. The whole place is packed to the rafters with families with small children (all of whom are expert skiers) and school kids. This makes it extremely difficult to practice or learn anything new on my own. With a great deal of effort (due to my aching body- I think I may lose a bit of excess weight doing this) I manage to do a few runs without falling over. Result.
As the day draws on it’s clear that I’m not going to get all that further with my newly acquired skills. I think it’s safe to say that Sundays may well be my day off from this as there are far too many people to safely negotiate. We all head back into Methven t 15:00p.m, and when we get back to the campsite we find that Dot hasn’t been on her balloon ride as it was cancelled due to cloudy skies. Although she waited patiently at the right place from 08:20a.m this morning, no-one came to pick her up. After Lyn from the ski shop phoned them up to find out where they were, apparently they had left a voice mail at 07:00a.m this morning. Maybe that was who rang while we were all getting ready this morning!
We’re off to Methven today. Methven is the place where Louise and I are going to be based for about six to eight weeks as we’re going to learn how to snowboard and ski. Due to the fact that Mt. Hutt has had some good early snow Flash said he fancied having a go as he’s a pretty good skier, so we thought we might as well go for a couple of days while we’re passing through. On the way we go over Arthurs Pass again, but this time we don’t see any Kea’s that we shouldn’t feed and I have a slight feeling of regret that my eagerness to feed them may have caused one or two to become slovenly and die.
FRIDAY 5TH JUNE
A very slow day today as we’d missed all two of the busses up to Mt. Hutt and so we had to bum around the town. I did have my first haircut since early March which was done by a girl from Bristol, who just so happens to have gone to school with one of the two people I’d ever spoken to in Methven before today- Small world. In the evening we had a homemade roast dinner and then I built a fire.
SATURDAY 6TH JUNE
We’re all up at 07:00a.m to catch the 09:45a.m bus up the hill to the ski slopes. It’s NZ$26 each to get up in the bus. Hopefully if we’re here for a good part of the season we can get a better price on the bus otherwise we’ll be cutting our snow time dramatically.
On the way up to the mountain Dot near enough has a heart attack as it’s so high up and the roads are windy and it’s windy and there are zero crash barriers. It comes as little consolation to her that the driver has done this for more than twenty years and a bus has so far failed to fall off the edge since the road has been open. Once we’re in and kitted up Flash goes about his day alone somewhere amongst the thousands of advanced level skiers while Louise and I find someone to teach us. In no time we find ourselves in some group lessons and we head our separate ways. I’m being taught by Matt a 26 year old from Christchurch who has been teaching for about three years even though he’s only been snowboarding for a total of five. Maybe it’s true what they say about snowboarding: it doesn’t take you long to get good at it.
The first challenge for me is to get into the leading foot of one of my bindings. Because I wasn’t too sure about which foot I would be leading with, Lyn the Shopkeeper set me up duck i.e. with both feet, toes angled out. It doesn’t take me long to realise that I’ll be more comfortable leading left-footed, which comes as a little bit of a surprise. Before long I’m able to snowboard in a straight line, turn left and right and stop. The only thing is I tend to fall over at will at regular intervals.
After lunch (which is needed) the rest of my group disappear and so I get one-on-one tuition. This helps me to sort out some of my problems and soon I’m off down the slopes on my own, but I’m still falling on my arse. And then the snow comes. This also coincides with the end of my lesson, which means I’m trying to ‘board on my own in heavy snow after only minimal guidance from Matt. I stick with it and manage not to kill myself or break any bones, which I must admit is good going on my part.
On the way down it’s still pissing with snow, and because she can’t see the drop, Dot is fine with the bus journey back into Methven - Weirdo.
SUNDAY 7TH JUNE
An even earlier start today as we get on the 07:45a.m bus. Dot stays at the campsite as she’s going for a hot-air balloon ride, which leaves the rest of us in peace. Somehow the journey takes two hours and so we miss out on an early lesson. The whole place is packed to the rafters with families with small children (all of whom are expert skiers) and school kids. This makes it extremely difficult to practice or learn anything new on my own. With a great deal of effort (due to my aching body- I think I may lose a bit of excess weight doing this) I manage to do a few runs without falling over. Result.
As the day draws on it’s clear that I’m not going to get all that further with my newly acquired skills. I think it’s safe to say that Sundays may well be my day off from this as there are far too many people to safely negotiate. We all head back into Methven t 15:00p.m, and when we get back to the campsite we find that Dot hasn’t been on her balloon ride as it was cancelled due to cloudy skies. Although she waited patiently at the right place from 08:20a.m this morning, no-one came to pick her up. After Lyn from the ski shop phoned them up to find out where they were, apparently they had left a voice mail at 07:00a.m this morning. Maybe that was who rang while we were all getting ready this morning!
Snowboard Master (4-7/06/09)
THURSDAY 4TH JUNE
We’re off to Methven today. Methven is the place where Louise and I are going to be based for about six to eight weeks as we’re going to learn how to snowboard and ski. Due to the fact that Mt. Hutt has had some good early snow Flash said he fancied having a go as he’s a pretty good skier, so we thought we might as well go for a couple of days while we’re passing through. On the way we go over Arthurs Pass again, but this time we don’t see any Kea’s that we shouldn’t feed and I have a slight feeling of regret that my eagerness to feed them may have caused one or two to become slovenly and die.
FRIDAY 5TH JUNE
A very slow day today as we’d missed all two of the busses up to Mt. Hutt and so we had to bum around the town. I did have my first haircut since early March which was done by a girl from Bristol, who just so happens to have gone to school with one of the two people I’d ever spoken to in Methven before today- Small world. In the evening we had a homemade roast dinner and then I built a fire.
SATURDAY 6TH JUNE
We’re all up at 07:00a.m to catch the 09:45a.m bus up the hill to the ski slopes. It’s NZ$26 each to get up in the bus. Hopefully if we’re here for a good part of the season we can get a better price on the bus otherwise we’ll be cutting our snow time dramatically.
On the way up to the mountain Dot near enough has a heart attack as it’s so high up and the roads are windy and it’s windy and there are zero crash barriers. It comes as little consolation to her that the driver has done this for more than twenty years and a bus has so far failed to fall off the edge since the road has been open. Once we’re in and kitted up Flash goes about his day alone somewhere amongst the thousands of advanced level skiers while Louise and I find someone to teach us. In no time we find ourselves in some group lessons and we head our separate ways. I’m being taught by Matt a 26 year old from Christchurch who has been teaching for about three years even though he’s only been snowboarding for a total of five. Maybe it’s true what they say about snowboarding: it doesn’t take you long to get good at it.
The first challenge for me is to get into the leading foot of one of my bindings. Because I wasn’t too sure about which foot I would be leading with, Lyn the Shopkeeper set me up duck i.e. with both feet, toes angled out. It doesn’t take me long to realise that I’ll be more comfortable leading left-footed, which comes as a little bit of a surprise. Before long I’m able to snowboard in a straight line, turn left and right and stop. The only thing is I tend to fall over at will at regular intervals.
After lunch (which is needed) the rest of my group disappear and so I get one-on-one tuition. This helps me to sort out some of my problems and soon I’m off down the slopes on my own, but I’m still falling on my arse. And then the snow comes. This also coincides with the end of my lesson, which means I’m trying to ‘board on my own in heavy snow after only minimal guidance from Matt. I stick with it and manage not to kill myself or break any bones, which I must admit is good going on my part.
On the way down it’s still pissing with snow, and because she can’t see the drop, Dot is fine with the bus journey back into Methven - Weirdo.
SUNDAY 7TH JUNE
An even earlier start today as we get on the 07:45a.m bus. Dot stays at the campsite as she’s going for a hot-air balloon ride, which leaves the rest of us in peace. Somehow the journey takes two hours and so we miss out on an early lesson. The whole place is packed to the rafters with families with small children (all of whom are expert skiers) and school kids. This makes it extremely difficult to practice or learn anything new on my own. With a great deal of effort (due to my aching body- I think I may lose a bit of excess weight doing this) I manage to do a few runs without falling over. Result.
As the day draws on it’s clear that I’m not going to get all that further with my newly acquired skills. I think it’s safe to say that Sundays may well be my day off from this as there are far too many people to safely negotiate. We all head back into Methven t 15:00p.m, and when we get back to the campsite we find that Dot hasn’t been on her balloon ride as it was cancelled due to cloudy skies. Although she waited patiently at the right place from 08:20a.m this morning, no-one came to pick her up. After Lyn from the ski shop phoned them up to find out where they were, apparently they had left a voice mail at 07:00a.m this morning. Maybe that was who rang while we were all getting ready this morning!
We’re off to Methven today. Methven is the place where Louise and I are going to be based for about six to eight weeks as we’re going to learn how to snowboard and ski. Due to the fact that Mt. Hutt has had some good early snow Flash said he fancied having a go as he’s a pretty good skier, so we thought we might as well go for a couple of days while we’re passing through. On the way we go over Arthurs Pass again, but this time we don’t see any Kea’s that we shouldn’t feed and I have a slight feeling of regret that my eagerness to feed them may have caused one or two to become slovenly and die.
FRIDAY 5TH JUNE
A very slow day today as we’d missed all two of the busses up to Mt. Hutt and so we had to bum around the town. I did have my first haircut since early March which was done by a girl from Bristol, who just so happens to have gone to school with one of the two people I’d ever spoken to in Methven before today- Small world. In the evening we had a homemade roast dinner and then I built a fire.
SATURDAY 6TH JUNE
We’re all up at 07:00a.m to catch the 09:45a.m bus up the hill to the ski slopes. It’s NZ$26 each to get up in the bus. Hopefully if we’re here for a good part of the season we can get a better price on the bus otherwise we’ll be cutting our snow time dramatically.
On the way up to the mountain Dot near enough has a heart attack as it’s so high up and the roads are windy and it’s windy and there are zero crash barriers. It comes as little consolation to her that the driver has done this for more than twenty years and a bus has so far failed to fall off the edge since the road has been open. Once we’re in and kitted up Flash goes about his day alone somewhere amongst the thousands of advanced level skiers while Louise and I find someone to teach us. In no time we find ourselves in some group lessons and we head our separate ways. I’m being taught by Matt a 26 year old from Christchurch who has been teaching for about three years even though he’s only been snowboarding for a total of five. Maybe it’s true what they say about snowboarding: it doesn’t take you long to get good at it.
The first challenge for me is to get into the leading foot of one of my bindings. Because I wasn’t too sure about which foot I would be leading with, Lyn the Shopkeeper set me up duck i.e. with both feet, toes angled out. It doesn’t take me long to realise that I’ll be more comfortable leading left-footed, which comes as a little bit of a surprise. Before long I’m able to snowboard in a straight line, turn left and right and stop. The only thing is I tend to fall over at will at regular intervals.
After lunch (which is needed) the rest of my group disappear and so I get one-on-one tuition. This helps me to sort out some of my problems and soon I’m off down the slopes on my own, but I’m still falling on my arse. And then the snow comes. This also coincides with the end of my lesson, which means I’m trying to ‘board on my own in heavy snow after only minimal guidance from Matt. I stick with it and manage not to kill myself or break any bones, which I must admit is good going on my part.
On the way down it’s still pissing with snow, and because she can’t see the drop, Dot is fine with the bus journey back into Methven - Weirdo.
SUNDAY 7TH JUNE
An even earlier start today as we get on the 07:45a.m bus. Dot stays at the campsite as she’s going for a hot-air balloon ride, which leaves the rest of us in peace. Somehow the journey takes two hours and so we miss out on an early lesson. The whole place is packed to the rafters with families with small children (all of whom are expert skiers) and school kids. This makes it extremely difficult to practice or learn anything new on my own. With a great deal of effort (due to my aching body- I think I may lose a bit of excess weight doing this) I manage to do a few runs without falling over. Result.
As the day draws on it’s clear that I’m not going to get all that further with my newly acquired skills. I think it’s safe to say that Sundays may well be my day off from this as there are far too many people to safely negotiate. We all head back into Methven t 15:00p.m, and when we get back to the campsite we find that Dot hasn’t been on her balloon ride as it was cancelled due to cloudy skies. Although she waited patiently at the right place from 08:20a.m this morning, no-one came to pick her up. After Lyn from the ski shop phoned them up to find out where they were, apparently they had left a voice mail at 07:00a.m this morning. Maybe that was who rang while we were all getting ready this morning!
I Think I Might Be Stuck (1-3/06/09)
MONDAY 1ST JUNE
We left Queenstown and drove to Franz Joseph village. It was probably the longest journey ever. It was different to all the rest as we picked up two hitch-hikers. One from South Africa via Wales and Zimbabwe named David, and one from France named Comb (like tomb but with a ‘C’). Dot was scared that they might try and kill us, as she watches too many films, and so she sat in the front with Louise for the first time in three and a half weeks. This left me to keep the two of them entertained with the help of Flash. There’s very little else to be said really, as sitting in the back of a campervan really is quite boring. Although today is the end of New Zealand music month, and to celebrate they’ve brought out a CD and book containing New Zealand’s greatest songs. It turns out they’re both blank.
TUESDAY 2ND JUNE
Last night we freedom camped in FJ village, apparently you’re not supposed to. We realised this when Louise along with Steptoe and Son went for a helicopter ride around FJ and Fox glaciers. When they went to get in the helicopter, it just so happened that the exact place where we had camped overnight was also the main helipad. Oops! Maybe in future we should check out our surroundings a little better in future; although doing it in the dark is very difficult. As I said Louise, Flash and Dot went on a helicopter ride over the two main glaciers. By all accounts it was pretty amazing. That still doesn’t mean I want to do it as I’m even more wary of going in a helicopter than I am an aeroplane. Maybe one day, when they make it the safest mode of transport around, I might change my mind and go up in one.
WEDNESDAY 3RD JUNE
As we’re becoming ultra keen on doing walks all of a sudden, we got up really earlier and headed off to climb Franz Joseph Glacier this morning. When I say ‘we’, I’m not including Dot-Com in that as she struggles to climb the stairs at the best of times, so climbing a massive lump of ice will be pretty difficult.
Once we’ve sorted ourselves out and crossed over the 1.5 miles of rocks from the car park to the glacier face, we eventually get to step foot on to the billions of gallons of frozen water. First though we have to put on our crampons. We all get ourselves sorted (Flash, even though he’s just been shown can’t remember how to do it so I have to help him), except for two Chinese girls. Somehow they’ve managed to not get any crampons, despite being reminded and asked numerous times by the guides before and during the bus journey. Eventually after a lot of radio speak we set foot on the mighty Franz Joseph Glacier.
On the glacier walk itself there are eleven in our group, nine girls, one other lad and me. We are led by a young lad named Turtle. He’s been given this name, not due to his resemblance of a half-shelled amphibian, but because he is a very slow walker: my kind of guide. Once we’ve made it up the makeshift steps and over a load more rocks and rubble, we’re told that there will be a lot of small crevasses to negotiate and we’ll be on the ice for around six hours. The six hour ice time I can handle, but the small crevasses might be a challenge.
Turtle to leads the way and after around an hour in some of the rich kids in the group are moaning that ‘it’s a long way,’ or ‘it’s cold’. Get a grip; it’s a big block of ice. Before long we encounter our first crevasse and Louise has a massive panic when she gets stuck for a whole thirty seconds. After she takes her bag off, she gets through no problem. I then throw her back her bag and it falls into oblivion (it will only be lost for around eighty years mind, as that’s how long it takes for the very top ice to reach the bottom). Later on I get stuck in a crevasse, and then cut my hand on the ice just to add injury to insult. After getting patched up we start our descent back to the car park. It only takes around an hour, but it’s still dark by the time we get back to the village.
Later in the evening we go out to meet Louise, a woman we met earlier on in our travels whilst we were in Phuket. We catch up with a few drinks and some stories and then head back to the van absolutely knackered and aching.
We left Queenstown and drove to Franz Joseph village. It was probably the longest journey ever. It was different to all the rest as we picked up two hitch-hikers. One from South Africa via Wales and Zimbabwe named David, and one from France named Comb (like tomb but with a ‘C’). Dot was scared that they might try and kill us, as she watches too many films, and so she sat in the front with Louise for the first time in three and a half weeks. This left me to keep the two of them entertained with the help of Flash. There’s very little else to be said really, as sitting in the back of a campervan really is quite boring. Although today is the end of New Zealand music month, and to celebrate they’ve brought out a CD and book containing New Zealand’s greatest songs. It turns out they’re both blank.
TUESDAY 2ND JUNE
Last night we freedom camped in FJ village, apparently you’re not supposed to. We realised this when Louise along with Steptoe and Son went for a helicopter ride around FJ and Fox glaciers. When they went to get in the helicopter, it just so happened that the exact place where we had camped overnight was also the main helipad. Oops! Maybe in future we should check out our surroundings a little better in future; although doing it in the dark is very difficult. As I said Louise, Flash and Dot went on a helicopter ride over the two main glaciers. By all accounts it was pretty amazing. That still doesn’t mean I want to do it as I’m even more wary of going in a helicopter than I am an aeroplane. Maybe one day, when they make it the safest mode of transport around, I might change my mind and go up in one.
WEDNESDAY 3RD JUNE
As we’re becoming ultra keen on doing walks all of a sudden, we got up really earlier and headed off to climb Franz Joseph Glacier this morning. When I say ‘we’, I’m not including Dot-Com in that as she struggles to climb the stairs at the best of times, so climbing a massive lump of ice will be pretty difficult.
Once we’ve sorted ourselves out and crossed over the 1.5 miles of rocks from the car park to the glacier face, we eventually get to step foot on to the billions of gallons of frozen water. First though we have to put on our crampons. We all get ourselves sorted (Flash, even though he’s just been shown can’t remember how to do it so I have to help him), except for two Chinese girls. Somehow they’ve managed to not get any crampons, despite being reminded and asked numerous times by the guides before and during the bus journey. Eventually after a lot of radio speak we set foot on the mighty Franz Joseph Glacier.
On the glacier walk itself there are eleven in our group, nine girls, one other lad and me. We are led by a young lad named Turtle. He’s been given this name, not due to his resemblance of a half-shelled amphibian, but because he is a very slow walker: my kind of guide. Once we’ve made it up the makeshift steps and over a load more rocks and rubble, we’re told that there will be a lot of small crevasses to negotiate and we’ll be on the ice for around six hours. The six hour ice time I can handle, but the small crevasses might be a challenge.
Turtle to leads the way and after around an hour in some of the rich kids in the group are moaning that ‘it’s a long way,’ or ‘it’s cold’. Get a grip; it’s a big block of ice. Before long we encounter our first crevasse and Louise has a massive panic when she gets stuck for a whole thirty seconds. After she takes her bag off, she gets through no problem. I then throw her back her bag and it falls into oblivion (it will only be lost for around eighty years mind, as that’s how long it takes for the very top ice to reach the bottom). Later on I get stuck in a crevasse, and then cut my hand on the ice just to add injury to insult. After getting patched up we start our descent back to the car park. It only takes around an hour, but it’s still dark by the time we get back to the village.
Later in the evening we go out to meet Louise, a woman we met earlier on in our travels whilst we were in Phuket. We catch up with a few drinks and some stories and then head back to the van absolutely knackered and aching.
I Think I Might Be Stuck (1-3/06/09)
MONDAY 1ST JUNE
We left Queenstown and drove to Franz Joseph village. It was probably the longest journey ever. It was different to all the rest as we picked up two hitch-hikers. One from South Africa via Wales and Zimbabwe named David, and one from France named Comb (like tomb but with a ‘C’). Dot was scared that they might try and kill us, as she watches too many films, and so she sat in the front with Louise for the first time in three and a half weeks. This left me to keep the two of them entertained with the help of Flash. There’s very little else to be said really, as sitting in the back of a campervan really is quite boring. Although today is the end of New Zealand music month, and to celebrate they’ve brought out a CD and book containing New Zealand’s greatest songs. It turns out they’re both blank.
TUESDAY 2ND JUNE
Last night we freedom camped in FJ village, apparently you’re not supposed to. We realised this when Louise along with Steptoe and Son went for a helicopter ride around FJ and Fox glaciers. When they went to get in the helicopter, it just so happened that the exact place where we had camped overnight was also the main helipad. Oops! Maybe in future we should check out our surroundings a little better in future; although doing it in the dark is very difficult. As I said Louise, Flash and Dot went on a helicopter ride over the two main glaciers. By all accounts it was pretty amazing. That still doesn’t mean I want to do it as I’m even more wary of going in a helicopter than I am an aeroplane. Maybe one day, when they make it the safest mode of transport around, I might change my mind and go up in one.
WEDNESDAY 3RD JUNE
As we’re becoming ultra keen on doing walks all of a sudden, we got up really earlier and headed off to climb Franz Joseph Glacier this morning. When I say ‘we’, I’m not including Dot-Com in that as she struggles to climb the stairs at the best of times, so climbing a massive lump of ice will be pretty difficult.
Once we’ve sorted ourselves out and crossed over the 1.5 miles of rocks from the car park to the glacier face, we eventually get to step foot on to the billions of gallons of frozen water. First though we have to put on our crampons. We all get ourselves sorted (Flash, even though he’s just been shown can’t remember how to do it so I have to help him), except for two Chinese girls. Somehow they’ve managed to not get any crampons, despite being reminded and asked numerous times by the guides before and during the bus journey. Eventually after a lot of radio speak we set foot on the mighty Franz Joseph Glacier.
On the glacier walk itself there are eleven in our group, nine girls, one other lad and me. We are led by a young lad named Turtle. He’s been given this name, not due to his resemblance of a half-shelled amphibian, but because he is a very slow walker: my kind of guide. Once we’ve made it up the makeshift steps and over a load more rocks and rubble, we’re told that there will be a lot of small crevasses to negotiate and we’ll be on the ice for around six hours. The six hour ice time I can handle, but the small crevasses might be a challenge.
Turtle to leads the way and after around an hour in some of the rich kids in the group are moaning that ‘it’s a long way,’ or ‘it’s cold’. Get a grip; it’s a big block of ice. Before long we encounter our first crevasse and Louise has a massive panic when she gets stuck for a whole thirty seconds. After she takes her bag off, she gets through no problem. I then throw her back her bag and it falls into oblivion (it will only be lost for around eighty years mind, as that’s how long it takes for the very top ice to reach the bottom). Later on I get stuck in a crevasse, and then cut my hand on the ice just to add injury to insult. After getting patched up we start our descent back to the car park. It only takes around an hour, but it’s still dark by the time we get back to the village.
Later in the evening we go out to meet Louise, a woman we met earlier on in our travels whilst we were in Phuket. We catch up with a few drinks and some stories and then head back to the van absolutely knackered and aching.
We left Queenstown and drove to Franz Joseph village. It was probably the longest journey ever. It was different to all the rest as we picked up two hitch-hikers. One from South Africa via Wales and Zimbabwe named David, and one from France named Comb (like tomb but with a ‘C’). Dot was scared that they might try and kill us, as she watches too many films, and so she sat in the front with Louise for the first time in three and a half weeks. This left me to keep the two of them entertained with the help of Flash. There’s very little else to be said really, as sitting in the back of a campervan really is quite boring. Although today is the end of New Zealand music month, and to celebrate they’ve brought out a CD and book containing New Zealand’s greatest songs. It turns out they’re both blank.
TUESDAY 2ND JUNE
Last night we freedom camped in FJ village, apparently you’re not supposed to. We realised this when Louise along with Steptoe and Son went for a helicopter ride around FJ and Fox glaciers. When they went to get in the helicopter, it just so happened that the exact place where we had camped overnight was also the main helipad. Oops! Maybe in future we should check out our surroundings a little better in future; although doing it in the dark is very difficult. As I said Louise, Flash and Dot went on a helicopter ride over the two main glaciers. By all accounts it was pretty amazing. That still doesn’t mean I want to do it as I’m even more wary of going in a helicopter than I am an aeroplane. Maybe one day, when they make it the safest mode of transport around, I might change my mind and go up in one.
WEDNESDAY 3RD JUNE
As we’re becoming ultra keen on doing walks all of a sudden, we got up really earlier and headed off to climb Franz Joseph Glacier this morning. When I say ‘we’, I’m not including Dot-Com in that as she struggles to climb the stairs at the best of times, so climbing a massive lump of ice will be pretty difficult.
Once we’ve sorted ourselves out and crossed over the 1.5 miles of rocks from the car park to the glacier face, we eventually get to step foot on to the billions of gallons of frozen water. First though we have to put on our crampons. We all get ourselves sorted (Flash, even though he’s just been shown can’t remember how to do it so I have to help him), except for two Chinese girls. Somehow they’ve managed to not get any crampons, despite being reminded and asked numerous times by the guides before and during the bus journey. Eventually after a lot of radio speak we set foot on the mighty Franz Joseph Glacier.
On the glacier walk itself there are eleven in our group, nine girls, one other lad and me. We are led by a young lad named Turtle. He’s been given this name, not due to his resemblance of a half-shelled amphibian, but because he is a very slow walker: my kind of guide. Once we’ve made it up the makeshift steps and over a load more rocks and rubble, we’re told that there will be a lot of small crevasses to negotiate and we’ll be on the ice for around six hours. The six hour ice time I can handle, but the small crevasses might be a challenge.
Turtle to leads the way and after around an hour in some of the rich kids in the group are moaning that ‘it’s a long way,’ or ‘it’s cold’. Get a grip; it’s a big block of ice. Before long we encounter our first crevasse and Louise has a massive panic when she gets stuck for a whole thirty seconds. After she takes her bag off, she gets through no problem. I then throw her back her bag and it falls into oblivion (it will only be lost for around eighty years mind, as that’s how long it takes for the very top ice to reach the bottom). Later on I get stuck in a crevasse, and then cut my hand on the ice just to add injury to insult. After getting patched up we start our descent back to the car park. It only takes around an hour, but it’s still dark by the time we get back to the village.
Later in the evening we go out to meet Louise, a woman we met earlier on in our travels whilst we were in Phuket. We catch up with a few drinks and some stories and then head back to the van absolutely knackered and aching.
It's Not Too Extreme Is It? (29-31/05/09)
FRIDAY 29TH MAY
For some reason I’m not in the mood for extreme sports/activities and so therefore I pass on the opportunity to go on the Shot over jet. This is essentially sitting in a stunt speed boat and zooming around a river with your life in the hands of the driver. Louise went along with Batman and Robin while in the mean time I checked out the casino. As it turned out I won a fair bit playing Blackjack (supposedly a mugs game). Because I was enjoying myself so much I ended up being late meeting back with the Brady Bunch and was subsequently scolded until I told Louise how much I’d won.
SATURDAY 30TH MAY
Most of the day was spent wandering the town while Flash went to do his bungy jump. As I said before I’ve thought about doing it but Flash has no fear and disappeared at 14:00p.m to do the deed. In the meantime me, Louise and Dot checked out a bit more of Queenstown. It still seems a little quiet and I think that’s definitely the case as there still aren’t that many people inhabiting the streets. When you go to Queenstown, the only place you are supposed to eat is at Fergburger. As they say, ‘When in Rome.’ I wasn’t disappointed with my burger in a bag, and as I’d had a few afternoon drinks I will admit that this is officially the Nº1 after beer food, even above the humble kebab. Flash arrived safe and sound at 18:00p.m with the biggest cheesiest grin ever, pasted all over his face. He also had the funniest video ever of someone doing a bungy jump. In the evening Flash, because of his exertions earlier in the day stayed in while the rest of us headed out into the Queenstown night, which ended up with us in the casino. Without realising, Dot managed to win on the roulette table. I think it might have something to do with her being pissed. I did also see the F.A Cup final and was hoping for the impossible that neither team won, as I’m a Liverpool fan and hate both Everton and Chelsea.
SUNDAY 31ST MAY
I was a very late day today, due in no small part to last night’s excesses. Eventually we made it off the campsite and headed to do a bit of shopping. Louise wanted an All Blacks hoody and I wanted to buy the new British Lions rugby jersey and so we went to the local sports shop. I purchased the hoody for Louise and after I’d paid for it asked what turned out to be the most offensive question ever (well the way the shop owner reacted, you’d think I’d try to screw his wife)! I was foolish enough to ask why rugby jersey’s retail at NZ$150 when I can get the same jersey for the equivalent of NZ$120 back home. Apparently that’s the rrp and at least 8 people in the last two weeks had told him that NZ$150 was cheaper than they could get it the UK. I told him he was full of shit and if he’d spoke to me with that attitude before I’d bought the hoody for Louise then he would have lost a sale. What an arrogant prick.
We all went to Fergburger again for tea, Flash demolished the biggest burger on the menu along with a bag of chips. After pigging out we were all too knackered to do anything.
By the way, I can get a Lions jersey for £45 or NZ$113, so he was full of shit.
For some reason I’m not in the mood for extreme sports/activities and so therefore I pass on the opportunity to go on the Shot over jet. This is essentially sitting in a stunt speed boat and zooming around a river with your life in the hands of the driver. Louise went along with Batman and Robin while in the mean time I checked out the casino. As it turned out I won a fair bit playing Blackjack (supposedly a mugs game). Because I was enjoying myself so much I ended up being late meeting back with the Brady Bunch and was subsequently scolded until I told Louise how much I’d won.
SATURDAY 30TH MAY
Most of the day was spent wandering the town while Flash went to do his bungy jump. As I said before I’ve thought about doing it but Flash has no fear and disappeared at 14:00p.m to do the deed. In the meantime me, Louise and Dot checked out a bit more of Queenstown. It still seems a little quiet and I think that’s definitely the case as there still aren’t that many people inhabiting the streets. When you go to Queenstown, the only place you are supposed to eat is at Fergburger. As they say, ‘When in Rome.’ I wasn’t disappointed with my burger in a bag, and as I’d had a few afternoon drinks I will admit that this is officially the Nº1 after beer food, even above the humble kebab. Flash arrived safe and sound at 18:00p.m with the biggest cheesiest grin ever, pasted all over his face. He also had the funniest video ever of someone doing a bungy jump. In the evening Flash, because of his exertions earlier in the day stayed in while the rest of us headed out into the Queenstown night, which ended up with us in the casino. Without realising, Dot managed to win on the roulette table. I think it might have something to do with her being pissed. I did also see the F.A Cup final and was hoping for the impossible that neither team won, as I’m a Liverpool fan and hate both Everton and Chelsea.
SUNDAY 31ST MAY
I was a very late day today, due in no small part to last night’s excesses. Eventually we made it off the campsite and headed to do a bit of shopping. Louise wanted an All Blacks hoody and I wanted to buy the new British Lions rugby jersey and so we went to the local sports shop. I purchased the hoody for Louise and after I’d paid for it asked what turned out to be the most offensive question ever (well the way the shop owner reacted, you’d think I’d try to screw his wife)! I was foolish enough to ask why rugby jersey’s retail at NZ$150 when I can get the same jersey for the equivalent of NZ$120 back home. Apparently that’s the rrp and at least 8 people in the last two weeks had told him that NZ$150 was cheaper than they could get it the UK. I told him he was full of shit and if he’d spoke to me with that attitude before I’d bought the hoody for Louise then he would have lost a sale. What an arrogant prick.
We all went to Fergburger again for tea, Flash demolished the biggest burger on the menu along with a bag of chips. After pigging out we were all too knackered to do anything.
By the way, I can get a Lions jersey for £45 or NZ$113, so he was full of shit.
It's Not Too Extreme Is It? (29-31/05/09)
FRIDAY 29TH MAY
For some reason I’m not in the mood for extreme sports/activities and so therefore I pass on the opportunity to go on the Shot over jet. This is essentially sitting in a stunt speed boat and zooming around a river with your life in the hands of the driver. Louise went along with Batman and Robin while in the mean time I checked out the casino. As it turned out I won a fair bit playing Blackjack (supposedly a mugs game). Because I was enjoying myself so much I ended up being late meeting back with the Brady Bunch and was subsequently scolded until I told Louise how much I’d won.
SATURDAY 30TH MAY
Most of the day was spent wandering the town while Flash went to do his bungy jump. As I said before I’ve thought about doing it but Flash has no fear and disappeared at 14:00p.m to do the deed. In the meantime me, Louise and Dot checked out a bit more of Queenstown. It still seems a little quiet and I think that’s definitely the case as there still aren’t that many people inhabiting the streets. When you go to Queenstown, the only place you are supposed to eat is at Fergburger. As they say, ‘When in Rome.’ I wasn’t disappointed with my burger in a bag, and as I’d had a few afternoon drinks I will admit that this is officially the Nº1 after beer food, even above the humble kebab. Flash arrived safe and sound at 18:00p.m with the biggest cheesiest grin ever, pasted all over his face. He also had the funniest video ever of someone doing a bungy jump. In the evening Flash, because of his exertions earlier in the day stayed in while the rest of us headed out into the Queenstown night, which ended up with us in the casino. Without realising, Dot managed to win on the roulette table. I think it might have something to do with her being pissed. I did also see the F.A Cup final and was hoping for the impossible that neither team won, as I’m a Liverpool fan and hate both Everton and Chelsea.
SUNDAY 31ST MAY
I was a very late day today, due in no small part to last night’s excesses. Eventually we made it off the campsite and headed to do a bit of shopping. Louise wanted an All Blacks hoody and I wanted to buy the new British Lions rugby jersey and so we went to the local sports shop. I purchased the hoody for Louise and after I’d paid for it asked what turned out to be the most offensive question ever (well the way the shop owner reacted, you’d think I’d try to screw his wife)! I was foolish enough to ask why rugby jersey’s retail at NZ$150 when I can get the same jersey for the equivalent of NZ$120 back home. Apparently that’s the rrp and at least 8 people in the last two weeks had told him that NZ$150 was cheaper than they could get it the UK. I told him he was full of shit and if he’d spoke to me with that attitude before I’d bought the hoody for Louise then he would have lost a sale. What an arrogant prick.
We all went to Fergburger again for tea, Flash demolished the biggest burger on the menu along with a bag of chips. After pigging out we were all too knackered to do anything.
By the way, I can get a Lions jersey for £45 or NZ$113, so he was full of shit.
For some reason I’m not in the mood for extreme sports/activities and so therefore I pass on the opportunity to go on the Shot over jet. This is essentially sitting in a stunt speed boat and zooming around a river with your life in the hands of the driver. Louise went along with Batman and Robin while in the mean time I checked out the casino. As it turned out I won a fair bit playing Blackjack (supposedly a mugs game). Because I was enjoying myself so much I ended up being late meeting back with the Brady Bunch and was subsequently scolded until I told Louise how much I’d won.
SATURDAY 30TH MAY
Most of the day was spent wandering the town while Flash went to do his bungy jump. As I said before I’ve thought about doing it but Flash has no fear and disappeared at 14:00p.m to do the deed. In the meantime me, Louise and Dot checked out a bit more of Queenstown. It still seems a little quiet and I think that’s definitely the case as there still aren’t that many people inhabiting the streets. When you go to Queenstown, the only place you are supposed to eat is at Fergburger. As they say, ‘When in Rome.’ I wasn’t disappointed with my burger in a bag, and as I’d had a few afternoon drinks I will admit that this is officially the Nº1 after beer food, even above the humble kebab. Flash arrived safe and sound at 18:00p.m with the biggest cheesiest grin ever, pasted all over his face. He also had the funniest video ever of someone doing a bungy jump. In the evening Flash, because of his exertions earlier in the day stayed in while the rest of us headed out into the Queenstown night, which ended up with us in the casino. Without realising, Dot managed to win on the roulette table. I think it might have something to do with her being pissed. I did also see the F.A Cup final and was hoping for the impossible that neither team won, as I’m a Liverpool fan and hate both Everton and Chelsea.
SUNDAY 31ST MAY
I was a very late day today, due in no small part to last night’s excesses. Eventually we made it off the campsite and headed to do a bit of shopping. Louise wanted an All Blacks hoody and I wanted to buy the new British Lions rugby jersey and so we went to the local sports shop. I purchased the hoody for Louise and after I’d paid for it asked what turned out to be the most offensive question ever (well the way the shop owner reacted, you’d think I’d try to screw his wife)! I was foolish enough to ask why rugby jersey’s retail at NZ$150 when I can get the same jersey for the equivalent of NZ$120 back home. Apparently that’s the rrp and at least 8 people in the last two weeks had told him that NZ$150 was cheaper than they could get it the UK. I told him he was full of shit and if he’d spoke to me with that attitude before I’d bought the hoody for Louise then he would have lost a sale. What an arrogant prick.
We all went to Fergburger again for tea, Flash demolished the biggest burger on the menu along with a bag of chips. After pigging out we were all too knackered to do anything.
By the way, I can get a Lions jersey for £45 or NZ$113, so he was full of shit.
Turn On The Lights (26-28/05/09)
TUESDAY 26TH MAY
Te Anau is only a small town, and it is mainly used as a base for people who want to go to Milford Sound. We’re no different, but as there isn’t much to do unless you want to walk by the lake (which is pretty difficult when you have someone with severe arthritis), we ended up wandering the town looking for tat and souvenirs for family and friends. Dot bought some kiwi chocolate which we all ate the minute we sat down.In the evening we visited the famous Te Anau Glow worm caves (another monopoly tick). I suppose I was expecting a little bit too much when I thought the aforementioned glow worms would light up the cave like a 40Watt bulb. For the past couple of weeks since I’ve known that I’d be coming to these caves I’ve been a bit thick. Why would some tiny glow worms light up a cave like Blackpool illuminations’? They wouldn’t would they? The main reason for this would be that they’re tiny little worms, and not light bulbs.
WEDNESDAY 27TH MAY
A nice early start today: this seems to have become a rare occurrence since Porgy and Bess have been with us, as they both like to lie in bed all morning. Anyway I digress. We’re off to the spectacular Milford Sound in the New Zealand Fiordlands. We’re on a bus trip with a load of strangers, some token Japs and a tour guide who looks like he’s been shot in the face or mauled by a bear and then had his face patched up by a blind man. All that being said he’s a very good tour guide. On the way to Milford the only thing we pass that we learn anything about is the Homer Tunnel. The tunnel itself took 18 years to complete and this seems a pretty long time, even for the thirties and forties when it was built. When you realise that it has quite a big slope and goes through a mountain, then maybe the time scale is justified. We arrived at Milford Sound and headed for our ferry. Even from the quay you can see how spectacular it looks, although it’s nothing compared to when you’re actually sailing through it.I don’t think there are any adjectives that can describe Milford Sound in such a way that you realise its beauty and size, but here are a few that are still a way off the mark; Vast, mesmerizing, calm, and exposed. On the way back we stopped at the wonderfully named Mirror Lakes, where you could see a perfect reflection of the mountains. We also stopped at a place called The Chasm, which did exactly what it said on the tin.
THURSDAY 28TH MAY
Our last day in Te Anau was spent trying to organise The Two Ronnie’s. Between them, they have no idea where they’ve been or where they’re going. Today we’re going to Queenstown, and when we told Butch and Sundance they said, ‘Oh, Ok. What’s there to do there?’ Now I’
m not being funny, but this is Queenstown, New Zealand, extreme sports capital of the world. But if you go around with your head in the clouds like these pair, then you’re not going to know that are you? On the way out of Te Anau, I got my picture took with a statue of a stag. I don’t know why I just thought it would look good. As it turns out it doesn’t, as you can see.
We arrived in Queenstown early afternoon and the place seemed a little bit subdued. It might be because the snow season hasn’t quite kicked off yet but we’ll see. We all had a walk round to check out some of the sights and sounds and see how much money we could spend. As it turns out you can spend a fortune here as predicted. Flash wants to do the 134m (440ft) bungy and it’s NZ$240 for the privilege. I’m thinking about doing it, but that’s about probably as far as I’ll get with it, thinking.
Te Anau is only a small town, and it is mainly used as a base for people who want to go to Milford Sound. We’re no different, but as there isn’t much to do unless you want to walk by the lake (which is pretty difficult when you have someone with severe arthritis), we ended up wandering the town looking for tat and souvenirs for family and friends. Dot bought some kiwi chocolate which we all ate the minute we sat down.In the evening we visited the famous Te Anau Glow worm caves (another monopoly tick). I suppose I was expecting a little bit too much when I thought the aforementioned glow worms would light up the cave like a 40Watt bulb. For the past couple of weeks since I’ve known that I’d be coming to these caves I’ve been a bit thick. Why would some tiny glow worms light up a cave like Blackpool illuminations’? They wouldn’t would they? The main reason for this would be that they’re tiny little worms, and not light bulbs.
WEDNESDAY 27TH MAY
A nice early start today: this seems to have become a rare occurrence since Porgy and Bess have been with us, as they both like to lie in bed all morning. Anyway I digress. We’re off to the spectacular Milford Sound in the New Zealand Fiordlands. We’re on a bus trip with a load of strangers, some token Japs and a tour guide who looks like he’s been shot in the face or mauled by a bear and then had his face patched up by a blind man. All that being said he’s a very good tour guide. On the way to Milford the only thing we pass that we learn anything about is the Homer Tunnel. The tunnel itself took 18 years to complete and this seems a pretty long time, even for the thirties and forties when it was built. When you realise that it has quite a big slope and goes through a mountain, then maybe the time scale is justified. We arrived at Milford Sound and headed for our ferry. Even from the quay you can see how spectacular it looks, although it’s nothing compared to when you’re actually sailing through it.I don’t think there are any adjectives that can describe Milford Sound in such a way that you realise its beauty and size, but here are a few that are still a way off the mark; Vast, mesmerizing, calm, and exposed. On the way back we stopped at the wonderfully named Mirror Lakes, where you could see a perfect reflection of the mountains. We also stopped at a place called The Chasm, which did exactly what it said on the tin.
THURSDAY 28TH MAY
Our last day in Te Anau was spent trying to organise The Two Ronnie’s. Between them, they have no idea where they’ve been or where they’re going. Today we’re going to Queenstown, and when we told Butch and Sundance they said, ‘Oh, Ok. What’s there to do there?’ Now I’
m not being funny, but this is Queenstown, New Zealand, extreme sports capital of the world. But if you go around with your head in the clouds like these pair, then you’re not going to know that are you? On the way out of Te Anau, I got my picture took with a statue of a stag. I don’t know why I just thought it would look good. As it turns out it doesn’t, as you can see.We arrived in Queenstown early afternoon and the place seemed a little bit subdued. It might be because the snow season hasn’t quite kicked off yet but we’ll see. We all had a walk round to check out some of the sights and sounds and see how much money we could spend. As it turns out you can spend a fortune here as predicted. Flash wants to do the 134m (440ft) bungy and it’s NZ$240 for the privilege. I’m thinking about doing it, but that’s about probably as far as I’ll get with it, thinking.
Turn On The Lights (26-28/05/09)
TUESDAY 26TH MAY
Te Anau is only a small town, and it is mainly used as a base for people who want to go to Milford Sound. We’re no different, but as there isn’t much to do unless you want to walk by the lake (which is pretty difficult when you have someone with severe arthritis), we ended up wandering the town looking for tat and souvenirs for family and friends. Dot bought some kiwi chocolate which we all ate the minute we sat down.In the evening we visited the famous Te Anau Glow worm caves (another monopoly tick). I suppose I was expecting a little bit too much when I thought the aforementioned glow worms would light up the cave like a 40Watt bulb. For the past couple of weeks since I’ve known that I’d be coming to these caves I’ve been a bit thick. Why would some tiny glow worms light up a cave like Blackpool illuminations’? They wouldn’t would they? The main reason for this would be that they’re tiny little worms, and not light bulbs.
WEDNESDAY 27TH MAY
A nice early start today: this seems to have become a rare occurrence since Porgy and Bess have been with us, as they both like to lie in bed all morning. Anyway I digress. We’re off to the spectacular Milford Sound in the New Zealand Fiordlands. We’re on a bus trip with a load of strangers, some token Japs and a tour guide who looks like he’s been shot in the face or mauled by a bear and then had his face patched up by a blind man. All that being said he’s a very good tour guide. On the way to Milford the only thing we pass that we learn anything about is the Homer Tunnel. The tunnel itself took 18 years to complete and this seems a pretty long time, even for the thirties and forties when it was built. When you realise that it has quite a big slope and goes through a mountain, then maybe the time scale is justified. We arrived at Milford Sound and headed for our ferry. Even from the quay you can see how spectacular it looks, although it’s nothing compared to when you’re actually sailing through it.I don’t think there are any adjectives that can describe Milford Sound in such a way that you realise its beauty and size, but here are a few that are still a way off the mark; Vast, mesmerizing, calm, and exposed. On the way back we stopped at the wonderfully named Mirror Lakes, where you could see a perfect reflection of the mountains. We also stopped at a place called The Chasm, which did exactly what it said on the tin.
THURSDAY 28TH MAY
Our last day in Te Anau was spent trying to organise The Two Ronnie’s. Between them, they have no idea where they’ve been or where they’re going. Today we’re going to Queenstown, and when we told Butch and Sundance they said, ‘Oh, Ok. What’s there to do there?’ Now I’m not being funny, but this is Queenstown, New Zealand, extreme sports capital of the world. But if you go around with your head in the clouds like these pair, then you’re not going to know that are you? On the way out of Te Anau, I got my picture took with a statue of a stag. I don’t know why I just thought it would look good. As it turns out it doesn’t, as you can see.
We arrived in Queenstown early afternoon and the place seemed a little bit subdued. It might be because the snow season hasn’t quite kicked off yet but we’ll see. We all had a walk round to check out some of the sights and sounds and see how much money we could spend. As it turns out you can spend a fortune here as predicted. Flash wants to do the 134m (440ft) bungy and it’s NZ$240 for the privilege. I’m thinking about doing it, but that’s about probably as far as I’ll get with it, thinking.
Te Anau is only a small town, and it is mainly used as a base for people who want to go to Milford Sound. We’re no different, but as there isn’t much to do unless you want to walk by the lake (which is pretty difficult when you have someone with severe arthritis), we ended up wandering the town looking for tat and souvenirs for family and friends. Dot bought some kiwi chocolate which we all ate the minute we sat down.In the evening we visited the famous Te Anau Glow worm caves (another monopoly tick). I suppose I was expecting a little bit too much when I thought the aforementioned glow worms would light up the cave like a 40Watt bulb. For the past couple of weeks since I’ve known that I’d be coming to these caves I’ve been a bit thick. Why would some tiny glow worms light up a cave like Blackpool illuminations’? They wouldn’t would they? The main reason for this would be that they’re tiny little worms, and not light bulbs.
WEDNESDAY 27TH MAY
A nice early start today: this seems to have become a rare occurrence since Porgy and Bess have been with us, as they both like to lie in bed all morning. Anyway I digress. We’re off to the spectacular Milford Sound in the New Zealand Fiordlands. We’re on a bus trip with a load of strangers, some token Japs and a tour guide who looks like he’s been shot in the face or mauled by a bear and then had his face patched up by a blind man. All that being said he’s a very good tour guide. On the way to Milford the only thing we pass that we learn anything about is the Homer Tunnel. The tunnel itself took 18 years to complete and this seems a pretty long time, even for the thirties and forties when it was built. When you realise that it has quite a big slope and goes through a mountain, then maybe the time scale is justified. We arrived at Milford Sound and headed for our ferry. Even from the quay you can see how spectacular it looks, although it’s nothing compared to when you’re actually sailing through it.I don’t think there are any adjectives that can describe Milford Sound in such a way that you realise its beauty and size, but here are a few that are still a way off the mark; Vast, mesmerizing, calm, and exposed. On the way back we stopped at the wonderfully named Mirror Lakes, where you could see a perfect reflection of the mountains. We also stopped at a place called The Chasm, which did exactly what it said on the tin.
THURSDAY 28TH MAY
Our last day in Te Anau was spent trying to organise The Two Ronnie’s. Between them, they have no idea where they’ve been or where they’re going. Today we’re going to Queenstown, and when we told Butch and Sundance they said, ‘Oh, Ok. What’s there to do there?’ Now I’
m not being funny, but this is Queenstown, New Zealand, extreme sports capital of the world. But if you go around with your head in the clouds like these pair, then you’re not going to know that are you? On the way out of Te Anau, I got my picture took with a statue of a stag. I don’t know why I just thought it would look good. As it turns out it doesn’t, as you can see.We arrived in Queenstown early afternoon and the place seemed a little bit subdued. It might be because the snow season hasn’t quite kicked off yet but we’ll see. We all had a walk round to check out some of the sights and sounds and see how much money we could spend. As it turns out you can spend a fortune here as predicted. Flash wants to do the 134m (440ft) bungy and it’s NZ$240 for the privilege. I’m thinking about doing it, but that’s about probably as far as I’ll get with it, thinking.
Use The Cheap Stuff (23-25/05/09)
SATURDAY 23RD MAY
An early start and we were on the road by 09:30a.m, which is pretty good considering there’s four us and two of them are Cannon and Ball. We made it to Invercargill just after lunchtime after stopping for extortionately priced diesel and seeing more hills and stuff.We followed the signs for the local i-site and ended up beside Queen’s Park. Outside the park were two large fountains, both of which had been vandalised. By vandalised I don’t mean spray painted, I mean vandalised in a way that you always wish you’d done as a kid. Yes, somebody had tipped two gallons of Pam’s (New Zealand’s budget brand) washing up liquid into it and the outcome was washing up bubbles everywhere. Like I say, I wish I had done it as a kid, but there wasn’t a fountain in my hometown. The closest thing I did was fire washing up liquid at a duck whilst on holiday in Newquay, and then laughed my head off two hours later when I realised there might be clouds of quacking bubbles floating along a river somewhere.There wasn’t all that much happening in Invercargill today, but just down the road in Bluff, there was the ‘World Famous Bluff Oyster Festival,’ so we headed there for some raw shellfish.
On arriving we managed to smuggle Dot in for free somehow, and then headed towards an array of tents, all of which were selling some kind of shellfish. I don’t like oysters, so stuck to bacon wrapped mussels (delicious), while everyone else had a go at the raw oysters. For some reason, Flash has no fear of anything other than frogs and toads. This means that he will climb, jump off or eat anything, so oysters were going to be no problem for him, and he quickly dispatched half a dozen. Louise wanted to have a go and reluctantly ate one. And then there was Dot. She pulls her face at anything that looks, smells or sounds unusual and oysters fall into at least two of those categories. Being unenthusiastic about eating an oyster, she still tried one. The look on her face said it all from the moment it was in her mouth. Over here they tell you to chew them, not swallow them whole so Dotty did. I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone pull so many faces in such a short space of time. I think it was safe to say that she didn’t enjoy the experience much.The rest of the day was spent wandering round the festival, and then we headed back to the campground.
SUNDAY 24TH MAY
Being as it’s Sunday, nowhere is open as usual. I think it has something to do with the people over here being a bit lazy. Now before people start moaning that I’m slagging off New Zealanders, this seems to be the opinion of most commentators on New Zealand culture and not my specific opinion. However I’m starting to agree as no-one seems to ever be around on a Sunday. Maybe it’s me and the fact that I’m used to 24/7 comforts. As all but the pubs were open, we went for a wander around Queens Park. The park is fairly big and has a large aviary with many indigenous birds such as the Kea and the Cockatoo. The latter of which was shouting ‘Hello’ and ‘Who’s a pretty boy,’ although its diction wasn’t the best it was still more decipherable than Flash.
MONDAY 25TH MAY
The van broke down. This meant after ringing the hire company and taking it to the garage we lost most of the day. Eventually we set off towards Te Anau at 16:00p.m. We finally arrived in Te Anau at 19:00p.m not before stopping off at Clifden Suspension Bridge, New Zealand’s oldest surviving suspension bridge. I wouldn’t have mentioned it as it wasn’t all that interesting, but Dot had a panic attack coming back over it as she thought it was going to collapse. While me and Louise stood laughing, Flash had the job of coaxing Dot back to the van all the while Dot was shouting,’ I don’t like it, I don’t like it.’
An early start and we were on the road by 09:30a.m, which is pretty good considering there’s four us and two of them are Cannon and Ball. We made it to Invercargill just after lunchtime after stopping for extortionately priced diesel and seeing more hills and stuff.We followed the signs for the local i-site and ended up beside Queen’s Park. Outside the park were two large fountains, both of which had been vandalised. By vandalised I don’t mean spray painted, I mean vandalised in a way that you always wish you’d done as a kid. Yes, somebody had tipped two gallons of Pam’s (New Zealand’s budget brand) washing up liquid into it and the outcome was washing up bubbles everywhere. Like I say, I wish I had done it as a kid, but there wasn’t a fountain in my hometown. The closest thing I did was fire washing up liquid at a duck whilst on holiday in Newquay, and then laughed my head off two hours later when I realised there might be clouds of quacking bubbles floating along a river somewhere.There wasn’t all that much happening in Invercargill today, but just down the road in Bluff, there was the ‘World Famous Bluff Oyster Festival,’ so we headed there for some raw shellfish.
On arriving we managed to smuggle Dot in for free somehow, and then headed towards an array of tents, all of which were selling some kind of shellfish. I don’t like oysters, so stuck to bacon wrapped mussels (delicious), while everyone else had a go at the raw oysters. For some reason, Flash has no fear of anything other than frogs and toads. This means that he will climb, jump off or eat anything, so oysters were going to be no problem for him, and he quickly dispatched half a dozen. Louise wanted to have a go and reluctantly ate one. And then there was Dot. She pulls her face at anything that looks, smells or sounds unusual and oysters fall into at least two of those categories. Being unenthusiastic about eating an oyster, she still tried one. The look on her face said it all from the moment it was in her mouth. Over here they tell you to chew them, not swallow them whole so Dotty did. I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone pull so many faces in such a short space of time. I think it was safe to say that she didn’t enjoy the experience much.The rest of the day was spent wandering round the festival, and then we headed back to the campground.
SUNDAY 24TH MAY
Being as it’s Sunday, nowhere is open as usual. I think it has something to do with the people over here being a bit lazy. Now before people start moaning that I’m slagging off New Zealanders, this seems to be the opinion of most commentators on New Zealand culture and not my specific opinion. However I’m starting to agree as no-one seems to ever be around on a Sunday. Maybe it’s me and the fact that I’m used to 24/7 comforts. As all but the pubs were open, we went for a wander around Queens Park. The park is fairly big and has a large aviary with many indigenous birds such as the Kea and the Cockatoo. The latter of which was shouting ‘Hello’ and ‘Who’s a pretty boy,’ although its diction wasn’t the best it was still more decipherable than Flash.
MONDAY 25TH MAY
The van broke down. This meant after ringing the hire company and taking it to the garage we lost most of the day. Eventually we set off towards Te Anau at 16:00p.m. We finally arrived in Te Anau at 19:00p.m not before stopping off at Clifden Suspension Bridge, New Zealand’s oldest surviving suspension bridge. I wouldn’t have mentioned it as it wasn’t all that interesting, but Dot had a panic attack coming back over it as she thought it was going to collapse. While me and Louise stood laughing, Flash had the job of coaxing Dot back to the van all the while Dot was shouting,’ I don’t like it, I don’t like it.’
Use The Cheap Stuff (23-25/05/09)
SATURDAY 23RD MAY
An early start and we were on the road by 09:30a.m, which is pretty good considering there’s four us and two of them are Cannon and Ball. We made it to Invercargill just after lunchtime after stopping for extortionately priced diesel and seeing more hills and stuff.We followed the signs for the local i-site and ended up beside Queen’s Park. Outside the park were two large fountains, both of which had been vandalised. By vandalised I don’t mean spray painted, I mean vandalised in a way that you always wish you’d done as a kid. Yes, somebody had tipped two gallons of Pam’s (New Zealand’s budget brand) washing up liquid into it and the outcome was washing up bubbles everywhere. Like I say, I wish I had done it as a kid, but there wasn’t a fountain in my hometown. The closest thing I did was fire washing up liquid at a duck whilst on holiday in Newquay, and then laughed my head off two hours later when I realised there might be clouds of quacking bubbles floating along a river somewhere.There wasn’t all that much happening in Invercargill today, but just down the road in Bluff, there was the ‘World Famous Bluff Oyster Festival,’ so we headed there for some raw shellfish.
On arriving we managed to smuggle Dot in for free somehow, and then headed towards an array of tents, all of which were selling some kind of shellfish. I don’t like oysters, so stuck to bacon wrapped mussels (delicious), while everyone else had a go at the raw oysters. For some reason, Flash has no fear of anything other than frogs and toads. This means that he will climb, jump off or eat anything, so oysters were going to be no problem for him, and he quickly dispatched half a dozen. Louise wanted to have a go and reluctantly ate one. And then there was Dot. She pulls her face at anything that looks, smells or sounds unusual and oysters fall into at least two of those categories. Being unenthusiastic about eating an oyster, she still tried one. The look on her face said it all from the moment it was in her mouth. Over here they tell you to chew them, not swallow them whole so Dotty did. I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone pull so many faces in such a short space of time. I think it was safe to say that she didn’t enjoy the experience much.The rest of the day was spent wandering round the festival, and then we headed back to the campground.
SUNDAY 24TH MAY
Being as it’s Sunday, nowhere is open as usual. I think it has something to do with the people over here being a bit lazy. Now before people start moaning that I’m slagging off New Zealanders, this seems to be the opinion of most commentators on New Zealand culture and not my specific opinion. However I’m starting to agree as no-one seems to ever be around on a Sunday. Maybe it’s me and the fact that I’m used to 24/7 comforts. As all but the pubs were open, we went for a wander around Queens Park. The park is fairly big and has a large aviary with many indigenous birds such as the Kea and the Cockatoo. The latter of which was shouting ‘Hello’ and ‘Who’s a pretty boy,’ although its diction wasn’t the best it was still more decipherable than Flash.
MONDAY 25TH MAY
The van broke down. This meant after ringing the hire company and taking it to the garage we lost most of the day. Eventually we set off towards Te Anau at 16:00p.m. We finally arrived in Te Anau at 19:00p.m not before stopping off at Clifden Suspension Bridge, New Zealand’s oldest surviving suspension bridge. I wouldn’t have mentioned it as it wasn’t all that interesting, but Dot had a panic attack coming back over it as she thought it was going to collapse. While me and Louise stood laughing, Flash had the job of coaxing Dot back to the van all the while Dot was shouting,’ I don’t like it, I don’t like it.’
An early start and we were on the road by 09:30a.m, which is pretty good considering there’s four us and two of them are Cannon and Ball. We made it to Invercargill just after lunchtime after stopping for extortionately priced diesel and seeing more hills and stuff.We followed the signs for the local i-site and ended up beside Queen’s Park. Outside the park were two large fountains, both of which had been vandalised. By vandalised I don’t mean spray painted, I mean vandalised in a way that you always wish you’d done as a kid. Yes, somebody had tipped two gallons of Pam’s (New Zealand’s budget brand) washing up liquid into it and the outcome was washing up bubbles everywhere. Like I say, I wish I had done it as a kid, but there wasn’t a fountain in my hometown. The closest thing I did was fire washing up liquid at a duck whilst on holiday in Newquay, and then laughed my head off two hours later when I realised there might be clouds of quacking bubbles floating along a river somewhere.There wasn’t all that much happening in Invercargill today, but just down the road in Bluff, there was the ‘World Famous Bluff Oyster Festival,’ so we headed there for some raw shellfish.
On arriving we managed to smuggle Dot in for free somehow, and then headed towards an array of tents, all of which were selling some kind of shellfish. I don’t like oysters, so stuck to bacon wrapped mussels (delicious), while everyone else had a go at the raw oysters. For some reason, Flash has no fear of anything other than frogs and toads. This means that he will climb, jump off or eat anything, so oysters were going to be no problem for him, and he quickly dispatched half a dozen. Louise wanted to have a go and reluctantly ate one. And then there was Dot. She pulls her face at anything that looks, smells or sounds unusual and oysters fall into at least two of those categories. Being unenthusiastic about eating an oyster, she still tried one. The look on her face said it all from the moment it was in her mouth. Over here they tell you to chew them, not swallow them whole so Dotty did. I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone pull so many faces in such a short space of time. I think it was safe to say that she didn’t enjoy the experience much.The rest of the day was spent wandering round the festival, and then we headed back to the campground.
SUNDAY 24TH MAY
Being as it’s Sunday, nowhere is open as usual. I think it has something to do with the people over here being a bit lazy. Now before people start moaning that I’m slagging off New Zealanders, this seems to be the opinion of most commentators on New Zealand culture and not my specific opinion. However I’m starting to agree as no-one seems to ever be around on a Sunday. Maybe it’s me and the fact that I’m used to 24/7 comforts. As all but the pubs were open, we went for a wander around Queens Park. The park is fairly big and has a large aviary with many indigenous birds such as the Kea and the Cockatoo. The latter of which was shouting ‘Hello’ and ‘Who’s a pretty boy,’ although its diction wasn’t the best it was still more decipherable than Flash.
MONDAY 25TH MAY
The van broke down. This meant after ringing the hire company and taking it to the garage we lost most of the day. Eventually we set off towards Te Anau at 16:00p.m. We finally arrived in Te Anau at 19:00p.m not before stopping off at Clifden Suspension Bridge, New Zealand’s oldest surviving suspension bridge. I wouldn’t have mentioned it as it wasn’t all that interesting, but Dot had a panic attack coming back over it as she thought it was going to collapse. While me and Louise stood laughing, Flash had the job of coaxing Dot back to the van all the while Dot was shouting,’ I don’t like it, I don’t like it.’
We're Related To The Krays. Righto! (18-22/05/09)
MONDAY 18TH MAY
Last night it rained constantly and carried on until we left the Evansdale Cheese factory. The only reason we stopped was because Louise was fed up of driving in the rain, which is fair enough I suppose. After filling up on tasty cheese we headed to the ‘Edinburgh of the South.’ I am of course talking about Dunedin. I don’t know why but Dunedin is one of the places I’ve looked forward the most on this trip, so we’ll see if it lives up to expectations. When we entered the city we didn’t know where we were going or where to head. As it turned out we ended up driving
past Baldwin Street, ‘The World’s Steepest Street.’ We thought we might as well walk up it, to quote a phrase ‘Because It’s There.’ It was a fair old hike, it’s only 150 yards long, but at 1 in 2.67 at its steepest point I suppose it is quite steep. Me, Louise and Flash all did it, and thankfully there was a water fountain at the top to have a drink and then head back down. At the bottom you can go to the shop and get your certificate to say you conquered the street. Before going to the campsite we had a wander around the city centre, or as it’s known ‘The Octagon.’ Louise and I went to the ticket office to see if we could get tickets for the All Blacks v France at Carisbrook (Dunedin’s Rugby Stadium). With a bit of luck we managed to get ourselves a couple of tickets for the match on 13th June, so it gives us an excuse to come back here without Eric and Ernie. Speaking of the Terrible Twins, they’ve booked themselves on a train journey tomorrow.
TUESDAY 19TH MAY
With Thelma and Louise on their railway journey it gave Louise and I a chance to just chill out a bit. Going on holiday with family is the most stressful thing in the world. Between Louise and I we managed to do the housekeeping, and that was about all she wrote. It did rain again for the entire day, leaving us both pretty fed up with the weather. I did manage to visit Dunedin Railway station as we had to pick up Cagney and Lacey; so that’s another tick for my monopoly list. Apparently Dunedin Railway Station is New Zealand’s most photographed building, so I thought I’d help keep that record up.
WEDNESDAY 20TH MAY
The weather’s not letting up. Still it is insisting on pissing down, today however it is sleet and hailstones as well as rain.We’ve stayed on a campsite since Monday, and so haven’t had to worry too much about being cold, it’s just pretty depressing when you want to go and do something but can’t for fear of getting drenched to the bone. With these obstacles to tackle we have no option but to choose indoor activities. And with all the options considered we opt for the Speight’s Brewery Tour. The tour seems to be a lot like the Monteith’s one Louise and I did in Greymouth; except for the fact that the guy on our tour was trying just that little bit too hard to get us excited about brewing beer. I enjoy drinking beer and I am interested up to a point, but I think that having gone on two tours in the last three weeks that I won’t ever go on another one unless it’s the Kopparberg Cider one. Plus this tour wasn’t as good as Monteith’s do better beer.
At the end of the tour we got talking to an English couple originally from London, who had been living in Queensland for the last 30 years. The conversation was just general chit-chat about England and what’s going on back there. The conversation then got to talking about London in the 1960’s. Now before I go on, I like a lot of people knew exactly where this story was going, I hoped it wouldn’t go where I thought, but it did. For those of you who don’t, let me carry on.
Back in the 1960’s the woman from this couple was only fourteen but her future husband was seventeen. One day she found out that her Uncles (just what she called them) had people following her to make sure this boy was behaving while out with their niece. Around ten years later after she’d left England, she was on the phone to her parents, and you’ll never guess what? That’s right, her ‘Uncles’ were none other than the infamous Ronnie and Reggie Kray (She made no mention of their other brother Charlie) What a load of bollocks. Somebody on the ‘gangster’ bandwagon again. Every time someone from London talks to me it seems they’re related to the Krays. Are they trying to impress me? I hope not because it doesn’t. Everyone who knows somebody that ever had a drink in an East End pub in the sixties has got a tale about the Krays. Most of them wouldn’t know who they were if you battered them with three life sized effigies. I don’t know why this really riles the shit out of me, because it's almost certainly lies.
Afterwards we went for the biggest meal ever at the Speight’s Ale House just down the road from the factory (which is situated on what seems the second steepest street in the world), then went to the Dunedin Casino where I promptly lost NZ$60 at Caribbean Stud. After much food and beer and gambling it was back to the joys of the campervan and the constant drumming of the rain.
THURSDAY 21ST MAY
Today we left Dunedin and headed out to the Otago Peninsula and Larnach Castle (another one for the monopoly board checklist). The Castle itself is set in amongst glorious gardens, and so it looks absolutely spectacular from the outside. That says quite a lot for the place as being an English Briton I get spoilt with my fair share of castles and stately homes. Inside is equally picturesque, but unfortunately I was unable to take photographs of the inside because rules is rules and they said so. So if you want to know what it’s like inside, you will have to either take my word that it is very nice or spent a thousand quid and fly here for yourself.As it was getting late on in the day we rushed to end of the peninsula to catch a glimpse of the only accessible albatross colony in the world. Unfortunately due to the inclement weather again that was very difficult and all that happened was Louise got wet along with The Krankies, and I got muddy. This was because I fell down a hill. Whilst walking down the hill, no sooner had I said to Louise that the track down to the cliff edge was a little bit slippery, I slid ten feet down the hill and was caked in mud and sheep shit. It wasn’t very gracious either. When it happened I looked like Dumbo on ice rather than Bambi. Worse still, we didn’t see a single albatross, just a lonely seal resting on the rocks.With me wet through and smelling like a sheep, we stopped at the nearest campsite to wash my clothes and get showered. In the meantime Louise and Dot got pissed on a box of wine – very classy indeed.
FRIDAY 22ND MAY
Finally, we left the Dunedin area and headed further south still, to Invercargill where we are planning on heading to Bluff and then to Stewart Island. Not knowing which way to go we stopped in the little town of Balclutha and asked the proprietor of the the local coffee shop. She recommended taking the Southern Scenic Route as it was very ‘scenic’. No shit Sherlock. As we were no wiser ourselves we took heed of the advice and proceeded along the SSR. Again the rain came. We saw what must have been 90% of New Zealand’s sheep population and the odd horse but little else. By scenic, I think they mean green, hilly and sheep infested. Because we were late leaving we ended up parked in a lay-by overnight just before the village of Papatowai. I think there were less than five cars that passed us all night as it is a very remote part of the country.
Last night it rained constantly and carried on until we left the Evansdale Cheese factory. The only reason we stopped was because Louise was fed up of driving in the rain, which is fair enough I suppose. After filling up on tasty cheese we headed to the ‘Edinburgh of the South.’ I am of course talking about Dunedin. I don’t know why but Dunedin is one of the places I’ve looked forward the most on this trip, so we’ll see if it lives up to expectations. When we entered the city we didn’t know where we were going or where to head. As it turned out we ended up driving
past Baldwin Street, ‘The World’s Steepest Street.’ We thought we might as well walk up it, to quote a phrase ‘Because It’s There.’ It was a fair old hike, it’s only 150 yards long, but at 1 in 2.67 at its steepest point I suppose it is quite steep. Me, Louise and Flash all did it, and thankfully there was a water fountain at the top to have a drink and then head back down. At the bottom you can go to the shop and get your certificate to say you conquered the street. Before going to the campsite we had a wander around the city centre, or as it’s known ‘The Octagon.’ Louise and I went to the ticket office to see if we could get tickets for the All Blacks v France at Carisbrook (Dunedin’s Rugby Stadium). With a bit of luck we managed to get ourselves a couple of tickets for the match on 13th June, so it gives us an excuse to come back here without Eric and Ernie. Speaking of the Terrible Twins, they’ve booked themselves on a train journey tomorrow.TUESDAY 19TH MAY
With Thelma and Louise on their railway journey it gave Louise and I a chance to just chill out a bit. Going on holiday with family is the most stressful thing in the world. Between Louise and I we managed to do the housekeeping, and that was about all she wrote. It did rain again for the entire day, leaving us both pretty fed up with the weather. I did manage to visit Dunedin Railway station as we had to pick up Cagney and Lacey; so that’s another tick for my monopoly list. Apparently Dunedin Railway Station is New Zealand’s most photographed building, so I thought I’d help keep that record up.
WEDNESDAY 20TH MAY
The weather’s not letting up. Still it is insisting on pissing down, today however it is sleet and hailstones as well as rain.We’ve stayed on a campsite since Monday, and so haven’t had to worry too much about being cold, it’s just pretty depressing when you want to go and do something but can’t for fear of getting drenched to the bone. With these obstacles to tackle we have no option but to choose indoor activities. And with all the options considered we opt for the Speight’s Brewery Tour. The tour seems to be a lot like the Monteith’s one Louise and I did in Greymouth; except for the fact that the guy on our tour was trying just that little bit too hard to get us excited about brewing beer. I enjoy drinking beer and I am interested up to a point, but I think that having gone on two tours in the last three weeks that I won’t ever go on another one unless it’s the Kopparberg Cider one. Plus this tour wasn’t as good as Monteith’s do better beer.
At the end of the tour we got talking to an English couple originally from London, who had been living in Queensland for the last 30 years. The conversation was just general chit-chat about England and what’s going on back there. The conversation then got to talking about London in the 1960’s. Now before I go on, I like a lot of people knew exactly where this story was going, I hoped it wouldn’t go where I thought, but it did. For those of you who don’t, let me carry on.
Back in the 1960’s the woman from this couple was only fourteen but her future husband was seventeen. One day she found out that her Uncles (just what she called them) had people following her to make sure this boy was behaving while out with their niece. Around ten years later after she’d left England, she was on the phone to her parents, and you’ll never guess what? That’s right, her ‘Uncles’ were none other than the infamous Ronnie and Reggie Kray (She made no mention of their other brother Charlie) What a load of bollocks. Somebody on the ‘gangster’ bandwagon again. Every time someone from London talks to me it seems they’re related to the Krays. Are they trying to impress me? I hope not because it doesn’t. Everyone who knows somebody that ever had a drink in an East End pub in the sixties has got a tale about the Krays. Most of them wouldn’t know who they were if you battered them with three life sized effigies. I don’t know why this really riles the shit out of me, because it's almost certainly lies.
Afterwards we went for the biggest meal ever at the Speight’s Ale House just down the road from the factory (which is situated on what seems the second steepest street in the world), then went to the Dunedin Casino where I promptly lost NZ$60 at Caribbean Stud. After much food and beer and gambling it was back to the joys of the campervan and the constant drumming of the rain.
THURSDAY 21ST MAY
Today we left Dunedin and headed out to the Otago Peninsula and Larnach Castle (another one for the monopoly board checklist). The Castle itself is set in amongst glorious gardens, and so it looks absolutely spectacular from the outside. That says quite a lot for the place as being an English Briton I get spoilt with my fair share of castles and stately homes. Inside is equally picturesque, but unfortunately I was unable to take photographs of the inside because rules is rules and they said so. So if you want to know what it’s like inside, you will have to either take my word that it is very nice or spent a thousand quid and fly here for yourself.As it was getting late on in the day we rushed to end of the peninsula to catch a glimpse of the only accessible albatross colony in the world. Unfortunately due to the inclement weather again that was very difficult and all that happened was Louise got wet along with The Krankies, and I got muddy. This was because I fell down a hill. Whilst walking down the hill, no sooner had I said to Louise that the track down to the cliff edge was a little bit slippery, I slid ten feet down the hill and was caked in mud and sheep shit. It wasn’t very gracious either. When it happened I looked like Dumbo on ice rather than Bambi. Worse still, we didn’t see a single albatross, just a lonely seal resting on the rocks.With me wet through and smelling like a sheep, we stopped at the nearest campsite to wash my clothes and get showered. In the meantime Louise and Dot got pissed on a box of wine – very classy indeed.
FRIDAY 22ND MAY
Finally, we left the Dunedin area and headed further south still, to Invercargill where we are planning on heading to Bluff and then to Stewart Island. Not knowing which way to go we stopped in the little town of Balclutha and asked the proprietor of the the local coffee shop. She recommended taking the Southern Scenic Route as it was very ‘scenic’. No shit Sherlock. As we were no wiser ourselves we took heed of the advice and proceeded along the SSR. Again the rain came. We saw what must have been 90% of New Zealand’s sheep population and the odd horse but little else. By scenic, I think they mean green, hilly and sheep infested. Because we were late leaving we ended up parked in a lay-by overnight just before the village of Papatowai. I think there were less than five cars that passed us all night as it is a very remote part of the country.
We're Related To The Krays. Righto! (18-22/05/09)
MONDAY 18TH MAY
Last night it rained constantly and carried on until we left the Evansdale Cheese factory. The only reason we stopped was because Louise was fed up of driving in the rain, which is fair enough I suppose. After filling up on tasty cheese we headed to the ‘Edinburgh of the South.’ I am of course talking about Dunedin. I don’t know why but Dunedin is one of the places I’ve looked forward the most on this trip, so we’ll see if it lives up to expectations. When we entered the city we didn’t know where we were going or where to head. As it turned out we ended up driving past Baldwin Street, ‘The World’s Steepest Street.’ We thought we might as well walk up it, to quote a phrase ‘Because It’s There.’ It was a fair old hike, it’s only 150 yards long, but at 1 in 2.67 at its steepest point I suppose it is quite steep. Me, Louise and Flash all did it, and thankfully there was a water fountain at the top to have a drink and then head back down. At the bottom you can go to the shop and get your certificate to say you conquered the street. Before going to the campsite we had a wander around the city centre, or as it’s known ‘The Octagon.’ Louise and I went to the ticket office to see if we could get tickets for the All Blacks v France at Carisbrook (Dunedin’s Rugby Stadium). With a bit of luck we managed to get ourselves a couple of tickets for the match on 13th June, so it gives us an excuse to come back here without Eric and Ernie. Speaking of the Terrible Twins, they’ve booked themselves on a train journey tomorrow.
TUESDAY 19TH MAY
With Thelma and Louise on their railway journey it gave Louise and I a chance to just chill out a bit. Going on holiday with family is the most stressful thing in the world. Between Louise and I we managed to do the housekeeping, and that was about all she wrote. It did rain again for the entire day, leaving us both pretty fed up with the weather. I did manage to visit Dunedin Railway station as we had to pick up Cagney and Lacey; so that’s another tick for my monopoly list. Apparently Dunedin Railway Station is New Zealand’s most photographed building, so I thought I’d help keep that record up.
WEDNESDAY 20TH MAY
The weather’s not letting up. Still it is insisting on pissing down, today however it is sleet and hailstones as well as rain.We’ve stayed on a campsite since Monday, and so haven’t had to worry too much about being cold, it’s just pretty depressing when you want to go and do something but can’t for fear of getting drenched to the bone. With these obstacles to tackle we have no option but to choose indoor activities. And with all the options considered we opt for the Speight’s Brewery Tour. The tour seems to be a lot like the Monteith’s one Louise and I did in Greymouth; except for the fact that the guy on our tour was trying just that little bit too hard to get us excited about brewing beer. I enjoy drinking beer and I am interested up to a point, but I think that having gone on two tours in the last three weeks that I won’t ever go on another one unless it’s the Kopparberg Cider one. Plus this tour wasn’t as good as Monteith’s do better beer.
At the end of the tour we got talking to an English couple originally from London, who had been living in Queensland for the last 30 years. The conversation was just general chit-chat about England and what’s going on back there. The conversation then got to talking about London in the 1960’s. Now before I go on, I like a lot of people knew exactly where this story was going, I hoped it wouldn’t go where I thought, but it did. For those of you who don’t, let me carry on.
Back in the 1960’s the woman from this couple was only fourteen but her future husband was seventeen. One day she found out that her Uncles (just what she called them) had people following her to make sure this boy was behaving while out with their niece. Around ten years later after she’d left England, she was on the phone to her parents, and you’ll never guess what? That’s right, her ‘Uncles’ were none other than the infamous Ronnie and Reggie Kray (She made no mention of their other brother Charlie) What a load of bollocks. Somebody on the ‘gangster’ bandwagon again. Every time someone from London talks to me it seems they’re related to the Krays. Are they trying to impress me? I hope not because it doesn’t. Everyone who knows somebody that ever had a drink in an East End pub in the sixties has got a tale about the Krays. Most of them wouldn’t know who they were if you battered them with three life sized effigies. I don’t know why this really riles the shit out of me, because it's almost certainly lies.
Afterwards we went for the biggest meal ever at the Speight’s Ale House just down the road from the factory (which is situated on what seems the second steepest street in the world), then went to the Dunedin Casino where I promptly lost NZ$60 at Caribbean Stud. After much food and beer and gambling it was back to the joys of the campervan and the constant drumming of the rain.
THURSDAY 21ST MAY
Today we left Dunedin and headed out to the Otago Peninsula and Larnach Castle (another one for the monopoly board checklist). The Castle itself is set in amongst glorious gardens, and so it looks absolutely spectacular from the outside. That says quite a lot for the place as being an English Briton I get spoilt with my fair share of castles and stately homes. Inside is equally picturesque, but unfortunately I was unable to take photographs of the inside because rules is rules and they said so. So if you want to know what it’s like inside, you will have to either take my word that it is very nice or spent a thousand quid and fly here for yourself.As it was getting late on in the day we rushed to end of the peninsula to catch a glimpse of the only accessible albatross colony in the world. Unfortunately due to the inclement weather again that was very difficult and all that happened was Louise got wet along with The Krankies, and I got muddy. This was because I fell down a hill. Whilst walking down the hill, no sooner had I said to Louise that the track down to the cliff edge was a little bit slippery, I slid ten feet down the hill and was caked in mud and sheep shit. It wasn’t very gracious either. When it happened I looked like Dumbo on ice rather than Bambi. Worse still, we didn’t see a single albatross, just a lonely seal resting on the rocks.With me wet through and smelling like a sheep, we stopped at the nearest campsite to wash my clothes and get showered. In the meantime Louise and Dot got pissed on a box of wine – very classy indeed.
FRIDAY 22ND MAY
Finally, we left the Dunedin area and headed further south still, to Invercargill where we are planning on heading to Bluff and then to Stewart Island. Not knowing which way to go we stopped in the little town of Balclutha and asked the proprietor of the the local coffee shop. She recommended taking the Southern Scenic Route as it was very ‘scenic’. No shit Sherlock. As we were no wiser ourselves we took heed of the advice and proceeded along the SSR. Again the rain came. We saw what must have been 90% of New Zealand’s sheep population and the odd horse but little else. By scenic, I think they mean green, hilly and sheep infested. Because we were late leaving we ended up parked in a lay-by overnight just before the village of Papatowai. I think there were less than five cars that passed us all night as it is a very remote part of the country.
Last night it rained constantly and carried on until we left the Evansdale Cheese factory. The only reason we stopped was because Louise was fed up of driving in the rain, which is fair enough I suppose. After filling up on tasty cheese we headed to the ‘Edinburgh of the South.’ I am of course talking about Dunedin. I don’t know why but Dunedin is one of the places I’ve looked forward the most on this trip, so we’ll see if it lives up to expectations. When we entered the city we didn’t know where we were going or where to head. As it turned out we ended up driving
past Baldwin Street, ‘The World’s Steepest Street.’ We thought we might as well walk up it, to quote a phrase ‘Because It’s There.’ It was a fair old hike, it’s only 150 yards long, but at 1 in 2.67 at its steepest point I suppose it is quite steep. Me, Louise and Flash all did it, and thankfully there was a water fountain at the top to have a drink and then head back down. At the bottom you can go to the shop and get your certificate to say you conquered the street. Before going to the campsite we had a wander around the city centre, or as it’s known ‘The Octagon.’ Louise and I went to the ticket office to see if we could get tickets for the All Blacks v France at Carisbrook (Dunedin’s Rugby Stadium). With a bit of luck we managed to get ourselves a couple of tickets for the match on 13th June, so it gives us an excuse to come back here without Eric and Ernie. Speaking of the Terrible Twins, they’ve booked themselves on a train journey tomorrow.TUESDAY 19TH MAY
With Thelma and Louise on their railway journey it gave Louise and I a chance to just chill out a bit. Going on holiday with family is the most stressful thing in the world. Between Louise and I we managed to do the housekeeping, and that was about all she wrote. It did rain again for the entire day, leaving us both pretty fed up with the weather. I did manage to visit Dunedin Railway station as we had to pick up Cagney and Lacey; so that’s another tick for my monopoly list. Apparently Dunedin Railway Station is New Zealand’s most photographed building, so I thought I’d help keep that record up.
WEDNESDAY 20TH MAY
The weather’s not letting up. Still it is insisting on pissing down, today however it is sleet and hailstones as well as rain.We’ve stayed on a campsite since Monday, and so haven’t had to worry too much about being cold, it’s just pretty depressing when you want to go and do something but can’t for fear of getting drenched to the bone. With these obstacles to tackle we have no option but to choose indoor activities. And with all the options considered we opt for the Speight’s Brewery Tour. The tour seems to be a lot like the Monteith’s one Louise and I did in Greymouth; except for the fact that the guy on our tour was trying just that little bit too hard to get us excited about brewing beer. I enjoy drinking beer and I am interested up to a point, but I think that having gone on two tours in the last three weeks that I won’t ever go on another one unless it’s the Kopparberg Cider one. Plus this tour wasn’t as good as Monteith’s do better beer.
At the end of the tour we got talking to an English couple originally from London, who had been living in Queensland for the last 30 years. The conversation was just general chit-chat about England and what’s going on back there. The conversation then got to talking about London in the 1960’s. Now before I go on, I like a lot of people knew exactly where this story was going, I hoped it wouldn’t go where I thought, but it did. For those of you who don’t, let me carry on.
Back in the 1960’s the woman from this couple was only fourteen but her future husband was seventeen. One day she found out that her Uncles (just what she called them) had people following her to make sure this boy was behaving while out with their niece. Around ten years later after she’d left England, she was on the phone to her parents, and you’ll never guess what? That’s right, her ‘Uncles’ were none other than the infamous Ronnie and Reggie Kray (She made no mention of their other brother Charlie) What a load of bollocks. Somebody on the ‘gangster’ bandwagon again. Every time someone from London talks to me it seems they’re related to the Krays. Are they trying to impress me? I hope not because it doesn’t. Everyone who knows somebody that ever had a drink in an East End pub in the sixties has got a tale about the Krays. Most of them wouldn’t know who they were if you battered them with three life sized effigies. I don’t know why this really riles the shit out of me, because it's almost certainly lies.
Afterwards we went for the biggest meal ever at the Speight’s Ale House just down the road from the factory (which is situated on what seems the second steepest street in the world), then went to the Dunedin Casino where I promptly lost NZ$60 at Caribbean Stud. After much food and beer and gambling it was back to the joys of the campervan and the constant drumming of the rain.
THURSDAY 21ST MAY
Today we left Dunedin and headed out to the Otago Peninsula and Larnach Castle (another one for the monopoly board checklist). The Castle itself is set in amongst glorious gardens, and so it looks absolutely spectacular from the outside. That says quite a lot for the place as being an English Briton I get spoilt with my fair share of castles and stately homes. Inside is equally picturesque, but unfortunately I was unable to take photographs of the inside because rules is rules and they said so. So if you want to know what it’s like inside, you will have to either take my word that it is very nice or spent a thousand quid and fly here for yourself.As it was getting late on in the day we rushed to end of the peninsula to catch a glimpse of the only accessible albatross colony in the world. Unfortunately due to the inclement weather again that was very difficult and all that happened was Louise got wet along with The Krankies, and I got muddy. This was because I fell down a hill. Whilst walking down the hill, no sooner had I said to Louise that the track down to the cliff edge was a little bit slippery, I slid ten feet down the hill and was caked in mud and sheep shit. It wasn’t very gracious either. When it happened I looked like Dumbo on ice rather than Bambi. Worse still, we didn’t see a single albatross, just a lonely seal resting on the rocks.With me wet through and smelling like a sheep, we stopped at the nearest campsite to wash my clothes and get showered. In the meantime Louise and Dot got pissed on a box of wine – very classy indeed.
FRIDAY 22ND MAY
Finally, we left the Dunedin area and headed further south still, to Invercargill where we are planning on heading to Bluff and then to Stewart Island. Not knowing which way to go we stopped in the little town of Balclutha and asked the proprietor of the the local coffee shop. She recommended taking the Southern Scenic Route as it was very ‘scenic’. No shit Sherlock. As we were no wiser ourselves we took heed of the advice and proceeded along the SSR. Again the rain came. We saw what must have been 90% of New Zealand’s sheep population and the odd horse but little else. By scenic, I think they mean green, hilly and sheep infested. Because we were late leaving we ended up parked in a lay-by overnight just before the village of Papatowai. I think there were less than five cars that passed us all night as it is a very remote part of the country.
Flash Takes The Plunge(r) (14-17/05/09)
THURSDAY 14TH MAY
Instead of going down the coast, we headed inland to do the loop that would take in Lake Tekapo. First we stopped at the town of Geraldine for lunch. After lunch Louise and I went for a walk around town while leaving Laurel and Hardy to wash up. Surely they couldn’t balls that up could they? On the way back we saw Flash shoot up the road. We thought maybe he’d been caught short so we went back to the van and asked Dot where he’d gone. When we got into the van the pots hadn’t been done and asked Dot why they were still in the sink. She said that the sink was blocked and Flash had gone to get a plunger! Louise and I looked at each other in dismay and asked had they bothered checking to see if the gray water was full first. The answer was obviously no, as we checked it ourselves to see if it was full. The answer was a resounding yes. This meant that Flash had run around town looking for a plunger for no apparent reason. The plunger is now sat in the cupboard taking up space. We arrived at Lake Tekapo around 16:00p.m and headed for a campsite because we had to get some power and empty the gray water. We had a very quick walk around the town. After a swift one in the pub while we waited for Flash to book his star gazing (some people would say he does that all day already), it was back to camp for the night.
FRIDAY 15TH MAY
We woke up to a stunning sight as it had snowed over night, and all the mountains that surrounded the lake had a fresh blanket of white over them, amazing. Louise had found out there was an ice rink not far from the campsite and talked me into going. I was more than a little wary after my last experience in Central Park NYC. When I was there I fell over about six times in twenty minutes and only made it round twice before exiting the ice defeated, while Louise zoomed around like a pro. This time was different. Only me, Louise and Flash were on the ice so I was a bit more confident. Flash had been ribbing me about how it was easy so I thought ‘fuck it’ and just went for it. I turned out to be better than expected and didn’t fall over once. While Flash, after his boast about how easy it was, fell over at least three times. Afterwards we headed to the thermal pools where Dot joined us. These weren’t smelly like the ones at Hanmer Springs so it made for a more enjoyable experience. The backdrop of the snow-capped mountains was mind-blowing. I never thought I’d be sitting in a pool, relaxing without a care in the world with such incredible scenery all around. It beats working that’s for sure.Flash ‘Arry went star-gazing again as it was cancelled last night, so the rest of us stayed around the camp and listened to the incessant rain.
SATURDAY 16th MAY
We shot off a bit sharpish this morning as we didn’t pay for our second night on the camp. I begrudge paying anyway as we only used the showers and it cost us NZ$2. Flash managed to put his money in the wrong shower, so he was stood in a cold shower for five minutes before he realised. We headed to Oamaru a small town about seventy miles north of Dunedin. On the way we drove through a town called Twizel (I’ve put this in because I like the name),then drove past the massive Benmore Dam, before stopping to check out the Takiroa Maori Rock Art Site west of Duntroon. Some of them have fallen off as they’re on limestone, but it was worth a look.We arrived in Oamaru and Eric and Ernie booked a trip to see some yellow eyed penguins. Louise and I had already seen plenty of penguins so we spent the early evening in the local pub. After a couple of hours in the pub one of the barman said that there were two malingerers hanging around our van. I rushed outside to tackle the ne’er-do-wells and found Mork and Mindy looking for a way to get into the van, even though we’d told them we’d be waiting in the pub. Louise and I stayed out for the night and were going to go to the famous Penguin Club to watch a few bands until we found out there was only about 20 people inside and the bands were crap. Instead we stayed at the pub and drank half a bottle of Bombay Sapphire.
SUNDAY 17TH MAY
After waking up with a gin-head, I got a quick shower (by quick I mean get wet, turn off shower, have a wash, rinse off. These self contained campers only hold 80 litres of water but take 20 minutes to warm up 25 litres), and we went to visit the local whisky distillery. I not a whisky drinker at all but I went in all the same, and ended up spending all my time in the art gallery upstairs. Being ignorant about most forms of art, I found what was here really good, but hey what do I know. We left Oamaru and headed to Moeraki Boulders about forty miles up the road. I don’t know how they got here or what they’re made of, but I do know they look spectacular and they’re fun to climb on. But the best thing I saw while I was here was watching Dot get on and off one of the boulders. She has quite a bit of difficulty doing stuff like this has she has arthritis. However as we’re nearly related I’m allowed to laugh at her when she’s stumbling and groping while trying to get on and off some massive stones. So far it’s the funniest thing I’ve seen in New Zealand. After fun on the beach we stopped off at Shag Point to take a photo of the sign and then found somewhere to park. As it was dark and there was loads of rain we stayed within the warmth of the campervan and played Monopoly the ‘Here and Now New Zealand Edition’. I realised that without trying I’ve already visited 6 of the places on the board in the four weeks I’ve been here. Now that just makes me want to visit the rest of them now.
Instead of going down the coast, we headed inland to do the loop that would take in Lake Tekapo. First we stopped at the town of Geraldine for lunch. After lunch Louise and I went for a walk around town while leaving Laurel and Hardy to wash up. Surely they couldn’t balls that up could they? On the way back we saw Flash shoot up the road. We thought maybe he’d been caught short so we went back to the van and asked Dot where he’d gone. When we got into the van the pots hadn’t been done and asked Dot why they were still in the sink. She said that the sink was blocked and Flash had gone to get a plunger! Louise and I looked at each other in dismay and asked had they bothered checking to see if the gray water was full first. The answer was obviously no, as we checked it ourselves to see if it was full. The answer was a resounding yes. This meant that Flash had run around town looking for a plunger for no apparent reason. The plunger is now sat in the cupboard taking up space. We arrived at Lake Tekapo around 16:00p.m and headed for a campsite because we had to get some power and empty the gray water. We had a very quick walk around the town. After a swift one in the pub while we waited for Flash to book his star gazing (some people would say he does that all day already), it was back to camp for the night.
FRIDAY 15TH MAY
We woke up to a stunning sight as it had snowed over night, and all the mountains that surrounded the lake had a fresh blanket of white over them, amazing. Louise had found out there was an ice rink not far from the campsite and talked me into going. I was more than a little wary after my last experience in Central Park NYC. When I was there I fell over about six times in twenty minutes and only made it round twice before exiting the ice defeated, while Louise zoomed around like a pro. This time was different. Only me, Louise and Flash were on the ice so I was a bit more confident. Flash had been ribbing me about how it was easy so I thought ‘fuck it’ and just went for it. I turned out to be better than expected and didn’t fall over once. While Flash, after his boast about how easy it was, fell over at least three times. Afterwards we headed to the thermal pools where Dot joined us. These weren’t smelly like the ones at Hanmer Springs so it made for a more enjoyable experience. The backdrop of the snow-capped mountains was mind-blowing. I never thought I’d be sitting in a pool, relaxing without a care in the world with such incredible scenery all around. It beats working that’s for sure.Flash ‘Arry went star-gazing again as it was cancelled last night, so the rest of us stayed around the camp and listened to the incessant rain.
SATURDAY 16th MAY
We shot off a bit sharpish this morning as we didn’t pay for our second night on the camp. I begrudge paying anyway as we only used the showers and it cost us NZ$2. Flash managed to put his money in the wrong shower, so he was stood in a cold shower for five minutes before he realised. We headed to Oamaru a small town about seventy miles north of Dunedin. On the way we drove through a town called Twizel (I’ve put this in because I like the name),then drove past the massive Benmore Dam, before stopping to check out the Takiroa Maori Rock Art Site west of Duntroon. Some of them have fallen off as they’re on limestone, but it was worth a look.We arrived in Oamaru and Eric and Ernie booked a trip to see some yellow eyed penguins. Louise and I had already seen plenty of penguins so we spent the early evening in the local pub. After a couple of hours in the pub one of the barman said that there were two malingerers hanging around our van. I rushed outside to tackle the ne’er-do-wells and found Mork and Mindy looking for a way to get into the van, even though we’d told them we’d be waiting in the pub. Louise and I stayed out for the night and were going to go to the famous Penguin Club to watch a few bands until we found out there was only about 20 people inside and the bands were crap. Instead we stayed at the pub and drank half a bottle of Bombay Sapphire.
SUNDAY 17TH MAY
After waking up with a gin-head, I got a quick shower (by quick I mean get wet, turn off shower, have a wash, rinse off. These self contained campers only hold 80 litres of water but take 20 minutes to warm up 25 litres), and we went to visit the local whisky distillery. I not a whisky drinker at all but I went in all the same, and ended up spending all my time in the art gallery upstairs. Being ignorant about most forms of art, I found what was here really good, but hey what do I know. We left Oamaru and headed to Moeraki Boulders about forty miles up the road. I don’t know how they got here or what they’re made of, but I do know they look spectacular and they’re fun to climb on. But the best thing I saw while I was here was watching Dot get on and off one of the boulders. She has quite a bit of difficulty doing stuff like this has she has arthritis. However as we’re nearly related I’m allowed to laugh at her when she’s stumbling and groping while trying to get on and off some massive stones. So far it’s the funniest thing I’ve seen in New Zealand. After fun on the beach we stopped off at Shag Point to take a photo of the sign and then found somewhere to park. As it was dark and there was loads of rain we stayed within the warmth of the campervan and played Monopoly the ‘Here and Now New Zealand Edition’. I realised that without trying I’ve already visited 6 of the places on the board in the four weeks I’ve been here. Now that just makes me want to visit the rest of them now.
Flash Takes The Plunge(r) (14-17/05/09)
THURSDAY 14TH MAY
Instead of going down the coast, we headed inland to do the loop that would take in Lake Tekapo. First we stopped at the town of Geraldine for lunch. After lunch Louise and I went for a walk around town while leaving Laurel and Hardy to wash up. Surely they couldn’t balls that up could they? On the way back we saw Flash shoot up the road. We thought maybe he’d been caught short so we went back to the van and asked Dot where he’d gone. When we got into the van the pots hadn’t been done and asked Dot why they were still in the sink. She said that the sink was blocked and Flash had gone to get a plunger! Louise and I looked at each other in dismay and asked had they bothered checking to see if the gray water was full first. The answer was obviously no, as we checked it ourselves to see if it was full. The answer was a resounding yes. This meant that Flash had run around town looking for a plunger for no apparent reason. The plunger is now sat in the cupboard taking up space. We arrived at Lake Tekapo around 16:00p.m and headed for a campsite because we had to get some power and empty the gray water. We had a very quick walk around the town. After a swift one in the pub while we waited for Flash to book his star gazing (some people would say he does that all day already), it was back to camp for the night.
FRIDAY 15TH MAY
We woke up to a stunning sight as it had snowed over night, and all the mountains that surrounded the lake had a fresh blanket of white over them, amazing. Louise had found out there was an ice rink not far from the campsite and talked me into going. I was more than a little wary after my last experience in Central Park NYC. When I was there I fell over about six times in twenty minutes and only made it round twice before exiting the ice defeated, while Louise zoomed around like a pro. This time was different. Only me, Louise and Flash were on the ice so I was a bit more confident. Flash had been ribbing me about how it was easy so I thought ‘fuck it’ and just went for it. I turned out to be better than expected and didn’t fall over once. While Flash, after his boast about how easy it was, fell over at least three times. Afterwards we headed to the thermal pools where Dot joined us. These weren’t smelly like the ones at Hanmer Springs so it made for a more enjoyable experience. The backdrop of the snow-capped mountains was mind-blowing. I never thought I’d be sitting in a pool, relaxing without a care in the world with such incredible scenery all around. It beats working that’s for sure.Flash ‘Arry went star-gazing again as it was cancelled last night, so the rest of us stayed around the camp and listened to the incessant rain.
SATURDAY 16th MAY
We shot off a bit sharpish this morning as we didn’t pay for our second night on the camp. I begrudge paying anyway as we only used the showers and it cost us NZ$2. Flash managed to put his money in the wrong shower, so he was stood in a cold shower for five minutes before he realised. We headed to Oamaru a small town about seventy miles north of Dunedin. On the way we drove through a town called Twizel (I’ve put this in because I like the name),then drove past the massive Benmore Dam, before stopping to check out the Takiroa Maori Rock Art Site west of Duntroon. Some of them have fallen off as they’re on limestone, but it was worth a look.We arrived in Oamaru and Eric and Ernie booked a trip to see some yellow eyed penguins. Louise and I had already seen plenty of penguins so we spent the early evening in the local pub. After a couple of hours in the pub one of the barman said that there were two malingerers hanging around our van. I rushed outside to tackle the ne’er-do-wells and found Mork and Mindy looking for a way to get into the van, even though we’d told them we’d be waiting in the pub. Louise and I stayed out for the night and were going to go to the famous Penguin Club to watch a few bands until we found out there was only about 20 people inside and the bands were crap. Instead we stayed at the pub and drank half a bottle of Bombay Sapphire.
SUNDAY 17TH MAY
After waking up with a gin-head, I got a quick shower (by quick I mean get wet, turn off shower, have a wash, rinse off. These self contained campers only hold 80 litres of water but take 20 minutes to warm up 25 litres), and we went to visit the local whisky distillery. I not a whisky drinker at all but I went in all the same, and ended up spending all my time in the art gallery upstairs. Being ignorant about most forms of art, I found what was here really good, but hey what do I know. We left Oamaru and headed to Moeraki Boulders about forty miles up the road. I don’t know how they got here or what they’re made of, but I do know they look spectacular and they’re fun to climb on. But the best thing I saw while I was here was watching Dot get on and off one of the boulders. She has quite a bit of difficulty doing stuff like this has she has arthritis. However as we’re nearly related I’m allowed to laugh at her when she’s stumbling and groping while trying to get on and off some massive stones. So far it’s the funniest thing I’ve seen in New Zealand. After fun on the beach we stopped off at Shag Point to take a photo of the sign and then found somewhere to park. As it was dark and there was loads of rain we stayed within the warmth of the campervan and played Monopoly the ‘Here and Now New Zealand Edition’. I realised that without trying I’ve already visited 6 of the places on the board in the four weeks I’ve been here. Now that just makes me want to visit the rest of them now.
Instead of going down the coast, we headed inland to do the loop that would take in Lake Tekapo. First we stopped at the town of Geraldine for lunch. After lunch Louise and I went for a walk around town while leaving Laurel and Hardy to wash up. Surely they couldn’t balls that up could they? On the way back we saw Flash shoot up the road. We thought maybe he’d been caught short so we went back to the van and asked Dot where he’d gone. When we got into the van the pots hadn’t been done and asked Dot why they were still in the sink. She said that the sink was blocked and Flash had gone to get a plunger! Louise and I looked at each other in dismay and asked had they bothered checking to see if the gray water was full first. The answer was obviously no, as we checked it ourselves to see if it was full. The answer was a resounding yes. This meant that Flash had run around town looking for a plunger for no apparent reason. The plunger is now sat in the cupboard taking up space. We arrived at Lake Tekapo around 16:00p.m and headed for a campsite because we had to get some power and empty the gray water. We had a very quick walk around the town. After a swift one in the pub while we waited for Flash to book his star gazing (some people would say he does that all day already), it was back to camp for the night.
FRIDAY 15TH MAY
We woke up to a stunning sight as it had snowed over night, and all the mountains that surrounded the lake had a fresh blanket of white over them, amazing. Louise had found out there was an ice rink not far from the campsite and talked me into going. I was more than a little wary after my last experience in Central Park NYC. When I was there I fell over about six times in twenty minutes and only made it round twice before exiting the ice defeated, while Louise zoomed around like a pro. This time was different. Only me, Louise and Flash were on the ice so I was a bit more confident. Flash had been ribbing me about how it was easy so I thought ‘fuck it’ and just went for it. I turned out to be better than expected and didn’t fall over once. While Flash, after his boast about how easy it was, fell over at least three times. Afterwards we headed to the thermal pools where Dot joined us. These weren’t smelly like the ones at Hanmer Springs so it made for a more enjoyable experience. The backdrop of the snow-capped mountains was mind-blowing. I never thought I’d be sitting in a pool, relaxing without a care in the world with such incredible scenery all around. It beats working that’s for sure.Flash ‘Arry went star-gazing again as it was cancelled last night, so the rest of us stayed around the camp and listened to the incessant rain.
SATURDAY 16th MAY
We shot off a bit sharpish this morning as we didn’t pay for our second night on the camp. I begrudge paying anyway as we only used the showers and it cost us NZ$2. Flash managed to put his money in the wrong shower, so he was stood in a cold shower for five minutes before he realised. We headed to Oamaru a small town about seventy miles north of Dunedin. On the way we drove through a town called Twizel (I’ve put this in because I like the name),then drove past the massive Benmore Dam, before stopping to check out the Takiroa Maori Rock Art Site west of Duntroon. Some of them have fallen off as they’re on limestone, but it was worth a look.We arrived in Oamaru and Eric and Ernie booked a trip to see some yellow eyed penguins. Louise and I had already seen plenty of penguins so we spent the early evening in the local pub. After a couple of hours in the pub one of the barman said that there were two malingerers hanging around our van. I rushed outside to tackle the ne’er-do-wells and found Mork and Mindy looking for a way to get into the van, even though we’d told them we’d be waiting in the pub. Louise and I stayed out for the night and were going to go to the famous Penguin Club to watch a few bands until we found out there was only about 20 people inside and the bands were crap. Instead we stayed at the pub and drank half a bottle of Bombay Sapphire.
SUNDAY 17TH MAY
After waking up with a gin-head, I got a quick shower (by quick I mean get wet, turn off shower, have a wash, rinse off. These self contained campers only hold 80 litres of water but take 20 minutes to warm up 25 litres), and we went to visit the local whisky distillery. I not a whisky drinker at all but I went in all the same, and ended up spending all my time in the art gallery upstairs. Being ignorant about most forms of art, I found what was here really good, but hey what do I know. We left Oamaru and headed to Moeraki Boulders about forty miles up the road. I don’t know how they got here or what they’re made of, but I do know they look spectacular and they’re fun to climb on. But the best thing I saw while I was here was watching Dot get on and off one of the boulders. She has quite a bit of difficulty doing stuff like this has she has arthritis. However as we’re nearly related I’m allowed to laugh at her when she’s stumbling and groping while trying to get on and off some massive stones. So far it’s the funniest thing I’ve seen in New Zealand. After fun on the beach we stopped off at Shag Point to take a photo of the sign and then found somewhere to park. As it was dark and there was loads of rain we stayed within the warmth of the campervan and played Monopoly the ‘Here and Now New Zealand Edition’. I realised that without trying I’ve already visited 6 of the places on the board in the four weeks I’ve been here. Now that just makes me want to visit the rest of them now.
Dot Com And Flash Harry (11-13/05/09)
MONDAY 11TH MAY
We’re off to pick up Dot and Flash today. However, we have to go and pick up a bigger van as a 3-berth is going to be a bit of a squeeze. The new van’s massive and it’s got a shower and toilet so that’s a bonus, plus its diesel and manual; this means we’ll get around quicker and cheaper. We arrived at Christchurch International Terminal and after not too long out stroll Tweedle-Dum and Tweedle –Dee with grins as big as Cheshire Cats; which is ironic as they’re from Macclesfield (for those of you with little or no English geographical knowledge: Its in Cheshire). After the pleasantries are done with we load them into the van and head to the local PAK’nSAVE to pick up enough groceries to feed the British Army. Not before too long the jet-lag kicks in and Dot and Flash are asleep. I’m not really surprised though as they’ve flown in from Manchester with a twelve hour stopover in Singapore and they only got about three hours kip. I know I’d be knackered; at least we did ours in stages. We head back to the campsite for our final night in Christchurch. We don’t know where we’re going to tomorrow; as far as I can tell we’re going south.
TUESDAY 12TH MAY
Apparently we not going anywhere fast. The van’s got a leak somewhere so we’ve had to take it back. The people at the hire place were very apologetic and gave us a car for the day for our troubles while they fixed our van.With only a car that we have to return today we head off east to Lyttleton. Lyttleton is a little town just outside Christchurch that gives you spectacular views of Christchurch harbour from the top of a hill. We were only there about two hours and then the phone rang: our van was ready and waiting to be picked up so we could head on with our trip. Having picked up our van we headed back east to Akoroa, a little town famous for its French influences and it’s also home to the world’s smallest dolphin: Hector’s Dolphin. For some reason our map doesn’t show difference in altitude very clearly, so it took us over two hours to go sixty or so miles (note to self: purchase new map). This meant we got there and it was dark. All we could do under the circumstances was sit about and play board games. Not for too long mind as Flash and Dot, still jet-lagged, were asleep by 21:00p.m.
WEDNESDAY 13TH MAY
We managed not to get clamped for staying in a car park, so that was a good start to the day. Louise, Dot and Flash ‘Arry are off to swim with Hector’s dolphins today. I’m not really in to all that, and seeing as I don’t have a terminal illness, I don’t think I deserve to swim with dolphins. While the three stooges were out with flipper I just bummed around the town for a bit. Apart from the dolphin swimming, there isn’t much to see. There is quite a big French influence about the place. There would have been more had they bothered to stop eating horses for long enough to realise that the British had sneaked in under cover of darkness and declared New Zealand a British colony. Sadly they were still eating Red Rum’s knackers. Later on in the day we drove to Ashburton and parked up for the night. More board games ensued and then like good grownups we went to bed early.
We’re off to pick up Dot and Flash today. However, we have to go and pick up a bigger van as a 3-berth is going to be a bit of a squeeze. The new van’s massive and it’s got a shower and toilet so that’s a bonus, plus its diesel and manual; this means we’ll get around quicker and cheaper. We arrived at Christchurch International Terminal and after not too long out stroll Tweedle-Dum and Tweedle –Dee with grins as big as Cheshire Cats; which is ironic as they’re from Macclesfield (for those of you with little or no English geographical knowledge: Its in Cheshire). After the pleasantries are done with we load them into the van and head to the local PAK’nSAVE to pick up enough groceries to feed the British Army. Not before too long the jet-lag kicks in and Dot and Flash are asleep. I’m not really surprised though as they’ve flown in from Manchester with a twelve hour stopover in Singapore and they only got about three hours kip. I know I’d be knackered; at least we did ours in stages. We head back to the campsite for our final night in Christchurch. We don’t know where we’re going to tomorrow; as far as I can tell we’re going south.
TUESDAY 12TH MAY
Apparently we not going anywhere fast. The van’s got a leak somewhere so we’ve had to take it back. The people at the hire place were very apologetic and gave us a car for the day for our troubles while they fixed our van.With only a car that we have to return today we head off east to Lyttleton. Lyttleton is a little town just outside Christchurch that gives you spectacular views of Christchurch harbour from the top of a hill. We were only there about two hours and then the phone rang: our van was ready and waiting to be picked up so we could head on with our trip. Having picked up our van we headed back east to Akoroa, a little town famous for its French influences and it’s also home to the world’s smallest dolphin: Hector’s Dolphin. For some reason our map doesn’t show difference in altitude very clearly, so it took us over two hours to go sixty or so miles (note to self: purchase new map). This meant we got there and it was dark. All we could do under the circumstances was sit about and play board games. Not for too long mind as Flash and Dot, still jet-lagged, were asleep by 21:00p.m.
WEDNESDAY 13TH MAY
We managed not to get clamped for staying in a car park, so that was a good start to the day. Louise, Dot and Flash ‘Arry are off to swim with Hector’s dolphins today. I’m not really in to all that, and seeing as I don’t have a terminal illness, I don’t think I deserve to swim with dolphins. While the three stooges were out with flipper I just bummed around the town for a bit. Apart from the dolphin swimming, there isn’t much to see. There is quite a big French influence about the place. There would have been more had they bothered to stop eating horses for long enough to realise that the British had sneaked in under cover of darkness and declared New Zealand a British colony. Sadly they were still eating Red Rum’s knackers. Later on in the day we drove to Ashburton and parked up for the night. More board games ensued and then like good grownups we went to bed early.
Dot Com And Flash Harry (11-13/05/09)
MONDAY 11TH MAY
We’re off to pick up Dot and Flash today. However, we have to go and pick up a bigger van as a 3-berth is going to be a bit of a squeeze. The new van’s massive and it’s got a shower and toilet so that’s a bonus, plus its diesel and manual; this means we’ll get around quicker and cheaper. We arrived at Christchurch International Terminal and after not too long out stroll Tweedle-Dum and Tweedle –Dee with grins as big as Cheshire Cats; which is ironic as they’re from Macclesfield (for those of you with little or no English geographical knowledge: Its in Cheshire). After the pleasantries are done with we load them into the van and head to the local PAK’nSAVE to pick up enough groceries to feed the British Army. Not before too long the jet-lag kicks in and Dot and Flash are asleep. I’m not really surprised though as they’ve flown in from Manchester with a twelve hour stopover in Singapore and they only got about three hours kip. I know I’d be knackered; at least we did ours in stages. We head back to the campsite for our final night in Christchurch. We don’t know where we’re going to tomorrow; as far as I can tell we’re going south.
TUESDAY 12TH MAY
Apparently we not going anywhere fast. The van’s got a leak somewhere so we’ve had to take it back. The people at the hire place were very apologetic and gave us a car for the day for our troubles while they fixed our van.With only a car that we have to return today we head off east to Lyttleton. Lyttleton is a little town just outside Christchurch that gives you spectacular views of Christchurch harbour from the top of a hill. We were only there about two hours and then the phone rang: our van was ready and waiting to be picked up so we could head on with our trip. Having picked up our van we headed back east to Akoroa, a little town famous for its French influences and it’s also home to the world’s smallest dolphin: Hector’s Dolphin. For some reason our map doesn’t show difference in altitude very clearly, so it took us over two hours to go sixty or so miles (note to self: purchase new map). This meant we got there and it was dark. All we could do under the circumstances was sit about and play board games. Not for too long mind as Flash and Dot, still jet-lagged, were asleep by 21:00p.m.
WEDNESDAY 13TH MAY
We managed not to get clamped for staying in a car park, so that was a good start to the day. Louise, Dot and Flash ‘Arry are off to swim with Hector’s dolphins today. I’m not really in to all that, and seeing as I don’t have a terminal illness, I don’t think I deserve to swim with dolphins. While the three stooges were out with flipper I just bummed around the town for a bit. Apart from the dolphin swimming, there isn’t much to see. There is quite a big French influence about the place. There would have been more had they bothered to stop eating horses for long enough to realise that the British had sneaked in under cover of darkness and declared New Zealand a British colony. Sadly they were still eating Red Rum’s knackers. Later on in the day we drove to Ashburton and parked up for the night. More board games ensued and then like good grownups we went to bed early.
We’re off to pick up Dot and Flash today. However, we have to go and pick up a bigger van as a 3-berth is going to be a bit of a squeeze. The new van’s massive and it’s got a shower and toilet so that’s a bonus, plus its diesel and manual; this means we’ll get around quicker and cheaper. We arrived at Christchurch International Terminal and after not too long out stroll Tweedle-Dum and Tweedle –Dee with grins as big as Cheshire Cats; which is ironic as they’re from Macclesfield (for those of you with little or no English geographical knowledge: Its in Cheshire). After the pleasantries are done with we load them into the van and head to the local PAK’nSAVE to pick up enough groceries to feed the British Army. Not before too long the jet-lag kicks in and Dot and Flash are asleep. I’m not really surprised though as they’ve flown in from Manchester with a twelve hour stopover in Singapore and they only got about three hours kip. I know I’d be knackered; at least we did ours in stages. We head back to the campsite for our final night in Christchurch. We don’t know where we’re going to tomorrow; as far as I can tell we’re going south.
TUESDAY 12TH MAY
Apparently we not going anywhere fast. The van’s got a leak somewhere so we’ve had to take it back. The people at the hire place were very apologetic and gave us a car for the day for our troubles while they fixed our van.With only a car that we have to return today we head off east to Lyttleton. Lyttleton is a little town just outside Christchurch that gives you spectacular views of Christchurch harbour from the top of a hill. We were only there about two hours and then the phone rang: our van was ready and waiting to be picked up so we could head on with our trip. Having picked up our van we headed back east to Akoroa, a little town famous for its French influences and it’s also home to the world’s smallest dolphin: Hector’s Dolphin. For some reason our map doesn’t show difference in altitude very clearly, so it took us over two hours to go sixty or so miles (note to self: purchase new map). This meant we got there and it was dark. All we could do under the circumstances was sit about and play board games. Not for too long mind as Flash and Dot, still jet-lagged, were asleep by 21:00p.m.
WEDNESDAY 13TH MAY
We managed not to get clamped for staying in a car park, so that was a good start to the day. Louise, Dot and Flash ‘Arry are off to swim with Hector’s dolphins today. I’m not really in to all that, and seeing as I don’t have a terminal illness, I don’t think I deserve to swim with dolphins. While the three stooges were out with flipper I just bummed around the town for a bit. Apart from the dolphin swimming, there isn’t much to see. There is quite a big French influence about the place. There would have been more had they bothered to stop eating horses for long enough to realise that the British had sneaked in under cover of darkness and declared New Zealand a British colony. Sadly they were still eating Red Rum’s knackers. Later on in the day we drove to Ashburton and parked up for the night. More board games ensued and then like good grownups we went to bed early.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
